The Day After Independence Day
It is July 5th, the day after Independence Day. I stayed at home last night. I have no need to see any more fireworks, I think I have seen enough for the rest of my life. I am completely OK with not seeing another firework display ever again. I heard them though, going off somewhere out there.
Plus after what happened yesterday in Chicago where seven innocent people watching a parade were executed and many other injured, that sort of thing takes away any kind of reason to celebrate. One child lost both parents. This world is sick, well humans are sick. Poor children and poor animals, how they suffer because of the fools that saturate this earth. Adult human beings are truly vile. I am disgusted with so much.
These shooting that have been happening are sickening. It is almost easier to just scroll past it, until it happens too close to home, until it happens to somebody near and dear.
Yesterday I went for a walk in the forest and enjoyed the sun shining through the beautiful trees.
Stopped and saw a pretty flower growing happily by itself.
Last night before I fell asleep I read about Vincent Van Gogh's life and this evening I found a documentary about him (Van Gogh: Of Wheat Fields and Clouded Skies) and I sat in bed and watched it and cried. What a tragic life and what beauty he left behind.
On July 21 1882 he wrote....."What I want and set as my goal is damn difficult, and yet I don't believe I'm aiming too high, whether in figures, or in landscapes, I would like to express not something sentimentally melancholic but deep sorrow. In short I want to reach the point when people say of my work, "That man feels deeply and that man feels subtly". Despite my so-called coarseness, perhaps precisely because of it. What am I in the eyes of most people? A non-entity, or an oddity, or a disagreeable person, someone who has and will have, no position in society. In short, a little lower than the lowest. Very well, assuming that everything indeed is like that. Then through my work, I'd like to show what there is in the heart of such an oddity and such a nobody."
I feel that deep inside. And that is all I have to share this evening. Feeling sad and have a restlessness in my chest.
Plus after what happened yesterday in Chicago where seven innocent people watching a parade were executed and many other injured, that sort of thing takes away any kind of reason to celebrate. One child lost both parents. This world is sick, well humans are sick. Poor children and poor animals, how they suffer because of the fools that saturate this earth. Adult human beings are truly vile. I am disgusted with so much.
These shooting that have been happening are sickening. It is almost easier to just scroll past it, until it happens too close to home, until it happens to somebody near and dear.
Yesterday I went for a walk in the forest and enjoyed the sun shining through the beautiful trees.
Stopped and saw a pretty flower growing happily by itself.
Last night before I fell asleep I read about Vincent Van Gogh's life and this evening I found a documentary about him (Van Gogh: Of Wheat Fields and Clouded Skies) and I sat in bed and watched it and cried. What a tragic life and what beauty he left behind.
On July 21 1882 he wrote....."What I want and set as my goal is damn difficult, and yet I don't believe I'm aiming too high, whether in figures, or in landscapes, I would like to express not something sentimentally melancholic but deep sorrow. In short I want to reach the point when people say of my work, "That man feels deeply and that man feels subtly". Despite my so-called coarseness, perhaps precisely because of it. What am I in the eyes of most people? A non-entity, or an oddity, or a disagreeable person, someone who has and will have, no position in society. In short, a little lower than the lowest. Very well, assuming that everything indeed is like that. Then through my work, I'd like to show what there is in the heart of such an oddity and such a nobody."
I feel that deep inside. And that is all I have to share this evening. Feeling sad and have a restlessness in my chest.
