Entries by TATIANA

Friday night over with, my feet are aching. I want to leave this place already. Not going to go into any details but tonight I felt SO fed up and so out of place that I actually cried. It takes much to make me cry at work, I am usually very strong. Had to leave the floor and go into the dressing room for about five minutes to regroup because the tears came. I don't think I've been propositioned this much, ever. And they don't take a polite no for an answer. A dance is "too expensive" but everybody wants to know if "I go out on dates" or even worse. Listen, if I would agree to go on "a date" at 2 AM after work it sure would cost you a heck of a lot more than the dance you can't afford. Actually, I am so fed up that I am tempted to put the Stardust platforms in a box and not dance ever again. Anyone out there that wants to buy two pairs of used stripper heels, size 8? I know that I will feel better tomorrow and the end is in sight now. The torture will be over soon.
So I took a few deep breaths in the dressing room, dried my eyes and went out on the floor again and now tonight is over and I can go to sleep.
I am ok with the situation as a whole. You live and learn, maybe something good is hidden as a message for me in this.
Ok, about to shower and sleep now........

So last night was definitely an improvement (money wise) at work, it is still a crazy zoo though. More people are in town and more are coming in.
Have to tell ya'll about a "lecture" I got last night in "networking". LOL!
Sat down with a man from Vail, Colorado. After the usual introductions he started telling me that he is staying at some hunting lodge out here called SouthFork. I've heard it being mentioned before, supposedly a really nice place. He told me that if I was smart and here to make really good money I should come out to SouthFork during the day to "network" And he kept on babbling about how he knows the importance of doing just that, networking that is, because that is how he is doing business with his very rich millionaire clients. I listened politely for a few minutes before I had to interrupt him.
I informed him that the only "networking" I do is strictly inside the club, a controlled (well most clubs are controlled, I wouldn't say that Frank Day's is) and safe environment. I do not give a shit about how rich somebody is, I do not go and hang out during the day at some hunting lodge with a bunch of guys that I do not know. I have a Mom, I have Chhaya, friends that care for me - if something would happen to me my Mom would die from a broken heart. No money in the world is that important. Of course, as usual, he thought he was some kind of a besserwisser (like most men I encounter at work) and still wouldn't give up on the lecture. He said that 40 doctors just left South Fork, imagine if I would had been over there, entertaining, playing pool and having drinks. I guess the place has a bar too. First of all, I don't drink, and certainly not with strangers.
I'd much rather take a good E at a rave with my real friends. 40 doctors? So what? Just because you are a doctor doesn't mean that you are an honorable human being. Look at men with power, education, good family and/or wealth that have hurt women, some names that pop in my head......Dominique Strauss-Kahn and Michael Skakel (nephew of Ethel Kennedy).
Besides I need to sleep, eat and relax in the daytime, not sit around and banter with some people I don't know. I do that at night at work, that is plenty enough - trust me.
What is wrong with people? Really? Then I asked him if he would recommend to his daughter the same bright idea about "networking" as he presented to me. He got quiet for a second and then admitted that he wouldn't. Ok then.
I've heard that some girls here do that stuff, hang out and whatever that means, I don't know cause I am not there with them. But sorry, I don't do that. I don't have the time. I like my alone time, my sanity and safety too much. Besides there have been guys in there the last few days that talked about how rich they are, with a strong emphasis on talk , meaning not spending. The usual.....LOL!
When I danced in Vegas I did go and gamble after work a few times with people I met at work, never alone - always with another friend.
But honestly......the few times I did that it was kind of a pain in the ass and not worth it. But I always felt safe because I was in a casino with other people, not locked up by myself in some hunting lodge in the middle of nowhere.
After work I noticed how one girl I work with here got in a van with four other guys, she was drunk. All alone with four guys. I guess she was being smart "networking". That is not how I operate.
And when the guy I talked to yesterday kept on bugging me about having a drink I finally told him that I am here to IMPROVE my life, meaning my savings account. Not to make things worse for myself by getting wasted every night, waking up with a hangover and destroying my liver.
I feel great today, no hangover, it's noon and I am going for a run in the park. I'd rather work on my fitness than "network".

I got my coffee for today. There is a bakery in Gregory with decent coffee and pastries. It's owned by an old lady that is half deaf. When I asked for "a receipt" she thought I was asking for whiskey! I had to repeat myself three times and finally made a hand gesture pretending to write something and then she got it. Yeah, can I have some whiskey with that coffee and Bavarian Cream doughnut at 11 AM please?
It is still windy here, 68 mph, I think it's kind of scary, signs have blown down, trucks rolled over on the highways around here and fires are spreading, power outages.
I hope I don't get stuck here! What a nightmare that would be.
So I have been showing my "intellectual" side at work the last two nights discussing politics, impressing the hunters with my wit and knowledge. Since nobody is buying dances.
I think politics is a bunch of mumbo jumbo with it all revolving around doing favors for the people who give you the most money. Corruption.
I'm not going to get into it too much but if I had the power to change things around I would make it illegal for people on welfare to keep popping out kids just so they can collect money for their lazy asses. If you can't afford to feed yourself you shouldn't have kids. Simple.
Everybody can fall on hard times in life but things don't get any easier if you decide to get pregnant.
Also, population control - worldwide. Too many people on the planet, not enough resources and from what I've seen (especially this last week), many of them seem to have the mental capacity of an inbred. Scary. Beer can glued to hand, mouth agape with a string of drool coming out of it and can barely form a three word sentence. Yikes!
Legalize drugs already. I don't do them, I have but the times are few and far in between. The reasons to why drugs should be legalized are many and valid, plus people use drugs anyways legal or not.
I already know who I would vote for if I could. Since I am not a US citizen I can't vote. But if I could I would and it would be for these two. Just to make things more interesting! Like Romney is that much better than Sheen anyways. At least Charlie is funny.



So we have to gather at the club at 5 PM today, why I don't know. Probably to discuss how we are going to handle the sudden influx of people that are supposedly amassing here this weekend, I hope so because so far it has been a disaster.

It's 2 AM, super windy out, there is a high wind warning in effect. I got done with tonight's torture not too long ago, so happy that I can take a shower and go to sleep soon.
For some reason we have to be present at the club (HELL) at 5 PM tomorrow, why I don't know and I am NOT happy about that.
I CAN'T wait to leave this place! I am going to be a very happy girl when I am driving away from here.......
That's all I have to report for now. And that I am hungry but there is nothing open here, so I will eat again when I wake up.
GOOD NIGHT.

Me and another girl compared Frank Day's to hell last night. It was her first night ever working here and I met her at Heartbreakers in Williston last time I worked there. She was one of the better looking girls there. Well, she said that she is leaving this place as soon as she possible can, she thinks it is the worst and trashiest place she has ever worked at, full of white trash. Those were her words, so yep, there you go - I'm not the only one appalled.
Another girl got really drunk, cried and said she was very, very unhappy with how things are working out for her and then she passed out and had to be carried out to the car.
Me? I'm taking it night by night at this point. Made a little more last night than the night before but it was still a bad night, income wise.
The girls are friendly and I have met some nice ones. Two of them think that I look like a Victoria's Secret model (Thank You Naomi & Renee) and a nice man from Sioux Falls said that I am what God intended a woman to look like.
I've heard the Victoria's Secret plenty before (these people have obviously not seen me in the daytime, not so hot....) but not the other compliment the nice man came up with (at least not that I can remember).....aaaawwwwww!
So I spent most of my night talking about politics and life at the bar.
Then there were two annoying brutes that wondered why I am so shy? I don't think I am shy at all. If I would be shy I wouldn't be doing this. One thought that I should allow him to grab my boob for a $2 bill. LOL - really???! He was shocked when I declined. Then he upped the pot with a $10 (WOW!) and asked if I could just show them my boobs. I said "only on stage or during a lap dance". So that made me shy and not a "proper" stripper. This is what I have to deal with here. People talking a lot of stupid shit, lecturing me in how to behave..... But whatever.......hey, it could be worse I guess. And you know......"if you are afraid of personal attacks you're never going to make a difference.” (Gloria Allred). And I agree with that, I can take the lecturing - I love the dumb looks on their faces when I come back with something smart. Plus maybe, hopefully it will at least teach one of them something.
Soon I will be in Vegas - shopping, spending time with people I want to be around and getting massages from Cathy.
Until then I will grin and bear it......and talk back! 🙂

I am very disappointed so far with this adventure in South Dakota. The earnings have been really bad, for example I made $86 last night. That is absolutely NOT ok. And it wasn't only me, I think all girls I worked with last night, with maybe one exception hovered around that amount.
There are not enough people coming through and the people that are there, don't spend. I can make more than that at home just on stage, without having to worry about expenses like air fare, rental car and motel room. And being away from Chhaya. So far I am NOT happy.
After sitting and observing the stuff going on in the club last night I felt sad. Men are behaving like total IDIOTS here and majority of them are married because they wear wedding bands. They seem to lose all common sense here and think they can do and say whatever. If that was my boyfriend or husband I would had left the guy. I believe that if you are in a relationship you should honor the commitment you have to the other person and act respectfully even if your partner is out of sight. It's ok to have fun but there is a difference between fun and behaving nasty.
But the girls that I work with allow this behavior which makes me even more sad........
There is absolutely NO REASON for girls that dance to act crazy like this, downright dirty and embarrassing. One girl, while on stage, took one of her saggy boobs, sucked on it, then put it in the mouth of some guy on stage, then he sucked on it and then she put that boob back in her mouth.
I felt sick to my stomach. The guys see this and think that all of us act this way. So then they think that I am no fun and stuck up because I would never in my life do that.
And she did it on stage for a few bucks. Makes me wonder what she does during a lap dance.
Some other girl went on stage, yelled a bunch of obscenities about pussy and ass, then got off the stage naked while chugging a beer. It's just too trashy for me. Yeah, you might think that I am stuck up but I really don't care. I'd rather be perceived as stuck up than trashy. I like clubs where girls act classy and don't crawl all over guys with their VAGINES in people's faces - to me that's gross. I made a mistake coming here and now I have learned my lesson.
I should had listened to my friend Kiko and went to another town about 30 miles from here but I didn't have the number to the guy that owns the place. Well Kiko managed to get it for me yesterday but he can't get me in until the 26th. And that's not going to work for me.
Supposedly this weekend is going to be very busy here in Dallas but I am not expecting anything at this point.
Besides this I am good. Now I am going to go for a run in the park before getting ready for another night here. You never know, it might be ok tonight. If not - oh well......I can't do more than being true to myself.