Welcome to Chaos !!

I must be having PMS because everything feels like a chore and I am very emotional, moody and also SOOOO bored. Ugly weather today so I am happy that I soaked up the sun the last two days.
Even had a 20 second sudden crying spell last night because I was feeling sad and lonely. I don't think that I have any REAL friends here and I miss the ones that I do have but they are all far away. Friendship is a two way street and I do not get the communication through texting only and not putting in any effort for the friendship. It's like a plant - needs water to thrive. I don't like fake and phony people and it's difficult to make a quality friend.
But I am feeling a little better today, I have to do something FUN soon though, if there is anything even remotely fun here where I live that doesn't involve fishing, hunting and boozing. Or getting high with random people. Not my cup of tea.
I wish I lived closer to Chena hot springs.
Now I am going to try to upload some new songs on my iPod, getting tired of the ones I have. Plus all of a sudden some of the other girls at work like the Rihanna songs I play too, how typical (I say that with utter sarcasm) so they can play them all they want, I am getting something new, that nobody else plays.

So one of the reason I got those two blankets the other day, for using at work, is this post that I read at a for dancers only site.

"I work here in Des Moines. & wouldn't recommend it to anyone honestly. The club I work at most of the time..
Has no schedule. So you end up with 20-almost 30 girl a night now bc the manager lets about anyone work. No cameras in the VIP room..so the ones following the rules arent going home with a whole lot it seems. And last month a girl got fired bc she never told management about having HERPES! "

I mean, I have though about it before, hence the towel I always sit on. But after hearing about some "dancers" at work and what they do and after seeing some stuff myself, I decided it is better to be safe than sorry.

I LOVE sleeping outside in the sun. Just spent two hours on the porch with Chhaya, drifting in and out of sleep, sunbathing with only a large hat covering my face. It felt so good, one of life's simple pleasures. I need a hammock. But now my stomach is telling me it's time for some food, so I am going to get my latte and a scone and then I am coming back home again.
Another beautiful day here.......

Aside for some errands in Kenai that also included getting my daily latte, I spent all day at home, enjoying this beautiful day.
I picked my outfit and this is what I had on, except while doing errands - of course.





I took care of some things around the house and spent most of the day with Chhaya out on the lawn.



Ate all day. This was especially tasty, cottage cheese with blueberries and strawberries.



Chhaya was taking apart her stuffed animals as usual, they last a day, maybe two before she picks them apart. She can do no wrong, she is my little angel.



Watched a really bad movie with Jennifer Lowe Hewitt called Café. Well, watched five minutes of it before I started doing other things and just let the movie play on in the background........how do you get funds together to make a really crappy movie? I've seen a lot of crappy movies these last few days.

I love my snoring baby. She is sleeping and I am up, reading stuff online. Soon time for a bath and sleep.

First World Problem alert! Tatiana ran out of products, her fave MAC pink lipgloss, Clinique lash doubling mascara and L'Occitane night creme.
OH NOOOOO!!!! But she is not too worried, she is heading to Anchorage in a few weeks for another photo shoot, so while there she will get new products. But this time she might try the DiorShow mascara by Dior.

Tonight another at home movie evening. Back to work tomorrow.