I visited my friend Marie the other day. To get to her place I took the bus from Handen Centrum and hopped off at Evertsbergsvägen. When I got off the bus I got flooded with childhood memories. The school I used to go to is still there. I walked to school and home every day. Right there, on that paved path or sometimes across the grass. We had a huge field to play on and in the winter time we would ice skate on what during the rest of the year was the fotboll (soccer) field.
In one of those classrooms I learned the word umbrella and still remember that I thought it was funny sounding in a nice way and that I thought it would be a nice name for a horse. I loved horses back then (still do).
The apartment I lived in was up a hill and back then I would walk through a small forest area on this path and I walked on that same path the other day. It looks the same. It is like time froze here. It made me sad and I cried as I walked, remembering my childhood self and how innocent life was. We would play outside all day in the summer time, no care in the world. I was not aware of the pain life can bring.....then.
This is where me and my Mom lived for a few years. In that apartment to the left. My friends would come over and we would sit at the kitchen table and draw for hours. I remember reading in my room. I remember winters with mounds of snow and taking evening walks with my Mom and the sound the snow made under our boots and how the snow glistened under the street lights.
I met Marie here and she still lives in the building across from where I used to live. The area in the middle we called "Gården" and that is where we played until our Moms decided it was time for us to come home, so reluctantly we did. So many memories. It is kind of sad.....life goes by so fast. All the people that we meet, some stay some don't. I get super emotional over stuff like this. My heart hurts. Part of me wants to stay here in Sweden with my friends and the place I grew up. This has given me anxiety (I have experienced some anxiety in the mornings lately) and a friend adviced me to try to shake the thoughts/feelings off and go live in the NOW. Which is totally the way to do it. So I am trying to do just that.