Ham

Last night at work I spent a while trying on my new dress and body stocking and taking pictures of myself and organizing my lockers. I am very organized btw. We were slow anyways, not much was happening. I feel a bit like a ham in the dress and the body stocking, you know how a ham looks when it has all those strings wrapped around it. Flesh bulging out. But I love the straps on the black dress, I like that look. Dusty (our other DJ) took one look at me and said he can die happy now. We have been having so much fun at work lately, I really like most of the people I work with.....and I usually have a lot of fun when I go in. It makes me happy to say that.
So this is the black dress that I got at Lea's the other day.







And the pink body stocking. Both outfits have to be paired with my black boots I think.
I've had these boots for about five years and this past Halloween weekend was the first time I actually wore them at work.



And this is what you look like after wearing a body stocking for a few hours. Like a ham!
One size fits all and that meant that those wet lock stockings I also got at Lea's did not fit whatsoever, way too big for me. I was a bit disappointed but I gave them to somebody else. Lea's policy is absolutely no refunds and exchanges......a bit harsh I think since they don't allow you to try on any items that come in a box. So you take the chance of making a purchase you will regret later. Boooooooo! I'm glad the black dress fit at least, I got the small/medium size.



Now.....some recaps from work last week. Friday night it was Sharon's birthday.....more on that another time.
We had two prostitutes come in Saturday night looking for business, they do that sometimes. A strip club is a great place to find some horny guy that's willing to pay for sex. That's one of the main reasons why Las Vegas strip clubs do not allow women without male company enter strip clubs (at least that was the policy when I worked at a few of the larger topless clubs back in the day). Some people think it's because clubs are not women friendly, oh yes clubs are very women friendly (if you act normal that is and not like some judgmental and insecure psycho, trust me I have ZERO interest in your man). I don't mind when happy women come in but prostitutes take away business from the dancers so they are not welcome. These two strolled in and started chatting and ho-scializing with all the guys right away and next thing they were trying to set up for "dates" outside of the club. Boss Lady put her foot down and laid down the law and told the working girls to get out. Yeah, go to some other bar in town and spread your STDs, OK! One of them was actually pretty, I was like.....girl, what are you doing? When they walked out of the door I loudly blurted out....."You have a fat ass" because the not so pretty one actually did have a fat ass, it looked like a weird growth and I have Tourette's and can't help myself. Well, she heard me loud and clear and turned around with a look of murder in her eyes, I got on my phone quickly and pretended to be VERY busy. Oooops! Trust me my bark is WAY louder than my bite.....I do not know how to fight whatsoever and neither do I want to. I have nice hair and a face I do not need damaged.....I should insure myself just like Rihanna, Jennifer Lopez and Heidi Klum (just to mention a few) have done. I want to insure my whole self. I like all my body parts. How do you pick just one part? Later on Cricket and Boss Lady were laughing at me and reassured me that they have my back and that indeed she did have a fat ass. So I was just being honest, I did not say ugly ass, I said fat and for some people that's a good thing although I myself prefer a nice ass.
I know Boss Lady would protect me, she lays down the law in the club with an iron grip.
I don't have to worry about anything when she is around. Besides, what would she do without her Tatiana?
I also danced for a guy that comes in once in a while. He is very funny and nice but sometimes he gets too drunk and I told him that he is so much nicer and more fun to be around when he is sober. He is obnoxious when intoxicated. Well, Saturday night he was already kind of wasted when I talked to him. And then he told me that he is spending a lot of time with his Dad when he is not at work because his Dad is dying of cancer. He almost started crying when he told me this and I was close to tears as well. He left right after that.
I felt so bad for him, now I understand why the drinking might be an escape for him.
I also did one dance for a guy that smelled BAD. I did not feel the stench until I sat down next to him. I was very close to excusing myself and not doing the dance but I felt bad for him and did not want to hurt his feelings. From the looks of it, women certainly do not throw themselves all over him. He was sweaty, smelly and unattractive in general, I will be brutally honest....that is DISGUSTING. He basically got an air dance as much as possible and then I told him thanks and ran far away from him. Look, it is NASTY to come into a strip club or any kind of club/bar/restaurant smelling like sweat and unwashed body. That goes for the people coming in as guests and the girls that works as dancers. Once in a while a dancer will smell. Actually we have two. Two dancers I was around in the last week that have in my opinion questionable hygiene. On one of them it is very noticeable, I am not the only one talking about her severe lack of hygiene. Why a dancer would come in to work without taking a shower first in incomprehensible to me. I constantly hear that I look and smell clean and nice. Of course! Being clean is like the number one rule. And you do not mask an unwashed body with perfume and deodorant, ever. I would never ever smell bad at work. BARF!
After that reeking guy I decided that I will not dance for somebody that smells, I do not care if they think I am rude, I will and have every right to politely decline (and he asked me for the dance by the way), I'd rather be "rude" than on the verge of throwing up and then feeling traumatized afterwards. Cause I still feel grossed out when I think back at that.
Soap is cheap in this country. Take a shower and wear something clean before coming into a strip club.