Welcome to Chaos !!

A few months ago now I left Alaska where I had been living on and off since 2008 (first Anchorage then Kenai) and drove with Chhaya through Canada, after a few pit stops I ended up back in Vegas where in 2008 I started my journey to Alaska. Back in 2008 I packed up my Toyota 4 Runner in Vegas, drove to Bellingham, got on a ferry that took about 3 1/2 days, the ferry dropped us of in Haines and from there it was about 750 miles to Anchorage. I recall that I left Vegas on a Tuesday and arrived in Anchorage one week later on a Tuesday.
This time I packed up a Ford F250 and the drive through Canada took about five days.
The first couple of days, driving through the Yukon were not that fun. The road was bumpy for long stretches, everything looks the same.....trees and mountains, it's far in between gas stations and the signs showing miles to the next place for gas are also few and far in between. Very desolate. Pray that you do not brake down somewhere on the road through the Yukon. That first night I recall the moon was out and bright, lighting up the dark road for me and I had no radio to keep me company due to no reception, so I listened to cds. One of my favorite cds to listen to when I drive long stretches in solitude is Danny Tenaglia's double album "Global Underground 017: Danny Tenaglia in London."



My first stop to sleep was Whitehorse and it was just depressing there. But things gradually got better, once I entered British Columbia the scenery changed and it became very beautiful. Like WOW beautiful.
Somewhere in Canada, I can't recall where but I liked the sign.



Me and Chhaya slept in the car the whole way, here she is just waking up looking cute and sleepy still.









Mariposa Orchards in Keremeos BC was amazing. I would consider going back there. I was impressed.







Burning Man!



Finding a good espresso stand in Canada was next to impossible, a few hours from the US border I finally got a latte that was decent.



So now I can add that I drove through parts of Canada on the list of stuff that I have done, just me and Chhaya - she is a very well traveled puppy. I would consider going back on a drive in Canada if I had more time to explore places, camp and go to hot springs, preferably in an RV for comfort. This was just a drive through.
What's next? It looks like I will be leaving Vegas soon and continue back North. Not as far North as Alaska this time but I'm thinking I might go to Anchorage again in a few months and work, so far only a thought though. In fact, I kind of miss "my" beautiful house in Kenai with the daily visits from my animal friends, feeding my birds and squirrels and going to my office Coffee Roasters to write and the super yummy lattes from Kaladi. Who knows I might decide to move back there next year if I can't decide on where to live in the Lower 48, since it's kind of my house and I can move back into it basically whenever I want.....

A few hours ago I found out about the latest attack in France.....the death count is rising still. People are laying dead covered with sheets with blood seeping through them. I don't know what to say anymore. This kind of behavior and violence does not belong in the civilized world. Yes, I get angry too sometimes but never have I felt compelled to strap a bomb on me, grab my gun and go out and execute random people and then end the whole ordeal by blowing myself up. For what? To prove what? That I was crazy? Selfish? Political? What do these people want? What is the important statement being made here because I am totally missing the point. I can't wrap my thoughts around this to come up with any kind of reasonable explanation for it. Some societies have evolved, some are still stomping in the same place as they did thousands of years ago. Yes, I know that bombs are dropping in parts of the world and that innocent people are dying there too. At this point I have to say that any kind of group of people that boasts about recruiting young children to teach them violence and hate, view women as possessions, practices FGM, kidnaps and hold hostage journalists, aid workers and others that are trying to do only good to behead them, destroys books and monuments that are not to their liking, bombs planes out of the skies, forces their outdated and sick religious beliefs onto others - that is pure scum and should be exterminated. I don't care - bomb them. They will go straight to heaven anyways, right? No progress has been made in thousands of years besides that their weapons are more effective and they have the internet now, the mental progress......evolving as a human being has not happened.
I don't know at this point who is behind the latest in France. I'm sure we will find out soon. Who knows, it might be a gang of angry and violent Buddhists just wanting to stir shit up. What's going to change after this? What changed after Charlie Hebdo? Will European countries, like Sweden continue to take in grown men posing as scared refugee children with no form of documentation but a smart phone, give them a monthly check and housing (ingen fara sociala betala) at the expense of tax payers, while some of these "children" really are terrorists? Wake up Europe! What is going to change? Anything? Had I been in charge I would had allied up with Putin right away and cleaned up really good. No mercy. All the innocent people beheaded on camera in the last couple of years were shown no mercy either.
What did they do to deserve to die like that? What did Kayla Mueller ever do to deserve what happened to her (I think about Kayla)? And everybody like her.....trying to help and do good. Are they in heaven with God now or just dead, rotting flesh, a painful memory for family and friends?
Only ONE religion to my knowledge has a problem with every other religion that exists and even fights within themselves.
It's been going on for thousands of years, this bloody fight to push Jihad onto people that don't want to be part of it.
Eiffel Tower, Paris France 8 am Saturday November 14.



What else? I'm not in the mood to be social and wear close to nothing plus heels tonight.
I'm home with Chhaya.



I'm going to sleep soon, tomorrow my usual routine.....Sambalatte after I wake up. Yeah, I feel really bad about the whole situation in Europe right now but I still have to eat.



I am wondering what's going on in Paris right now.....what's going to change? When and where will the next terrorist attack happen? Close to me or you?

Last night I googled my blog just to see what would come up. See me and my friend and technical blog expert KISA discovered an issue with the blog recently. The issue was highlighted in red when my blog got googled but it's taken care of now......which is a good thing! What would I do without my KISA?
Anyhow, so when I googled the blog I saw that one of my pics made it to Pinterest......and no I did NOT submit myself, if that's even possible.....(I'm not that lame OK). OMG I'm famous now!!!!
Alaska Glacial Mud Co. somehow found one of my many facial mask selfies using their product, the Glacial Facial masque on my blog, this pic is several years old if I recall it correctly. How cool! Yeay.....my picture is on Pinterest and and a bunch of other random pics of me and stuff I took pics of, like Chhaya are found other places on the web when people search for whatever it is they search for. I can't keep track of it all. I never used Pinterest before last night....I also don't do Instagram (I get asked if I have Insta sometimes), I don't have Tumblr (although I have looked at some Tumblr pages before, there are some really cool ones dedicated to dancers), Snapchat - any of that stuff. I don't know how people have time!? I barely have time for the blog sometimes.......! I mean, I need to eat, sleep, take care of Chhaya and LIVE too.
And in case you wonder, I like the Glacial Facial masque, it works well!

So back in the day I used to hear that I looked like Gwyneth Paltrow a lot. When I say a lot I don't mean that one person said it and then somebody else said it like years later. No, a lot means frequently. I don't know about me looking like Gwyneth Paltrow but everybody has a different perception of what people look like. I have not heard Gwyneth in a while, it's been Iggy Azalea lately. Hmmmmm......Iggy? I can see a certain resemblance in some pics, maybe Iggy has Polish ancestry? The last time I heard Iggy was the night I auditioned at Stars in Bend, as soon as I walked into the dressing room a girl told me ....."You look like Iggy Azalea".
Last week when I went to PetSmart to buy Chhaya a bag of kibble a lady was giving a demonstration of a product she invented, we started talking and the she asked me if I'm Polish. I was like.....yes. She said she knew when she laid eyes on me. Crazy. Turns out she is first generation Polish, her Mother arrived to Chicago from Poland. The product she invented? The Total Pet Spa. Made in the US too! Check it out if you have a dog. We talked for a while, she told me her story, seems to be a very nice lady - Alicia Dionne. I wish her the best of luck with her product! Check it out!
www.thetotalpetspa.com

Also at Stars in Bend, a girl I worked with (all the girls were really nice at that club) came up to me with a picture on her phone that she wanted to show me and she said she had told some friends that she works with a girl (that would be me) that looks like the image in her phone.
It was this pic.....who is this warrior cartoon girl I wonder? It must be the hair.....



Funny how different people see you sometimes. I would love to be that warrior girl!
So yesterday I tried getting in touch with my friend Kenya that I met last year working in Vegas. Last time we talked she wanted to meet for lunch but then I left Vegas to go back to Alaska and it never happened. So I texted her. And a few minutes later my phone rings and it says "Kenya" on the display......I was like "Hiiiiiiii Baby!!!" On the other end of the line some angry woman with a heavy foreign accent tells me to not call that number again and try to talk to her male cousin. I was like calm down you crazy lady, I am trying to get a hold of my GIRLFRIEND not your dumb cousin (more likely husband or boyfriend, cause it sounded like an angry and jealous spouse/gf not somebody's cousin). I have NO interest in some dude, all I wanted was to get in touch with Kenya. I'm a little sad she changed numbers, I liked her. Super gorgeous girl and when I say gorgeous, that means gorgeous. I would just stare at her at work. And a crazy loud over the top personality. I wonder if I will ever see her again?

Last night me and Sarah Jane aka wonderhussy went to the Imperial Spa, I have been there once before but that was almost five years ago.....so it's been a while. We started with showering and sitting in the steam rooms. I also saw a lady frenetically chop down her pubes in the dry sauna.....like is that not something you do at home? I guess not. What's next I'm wondering? Then we did a hot dip and after that a good five minutes or more in the cold pool. Sorry no nudie pics (that I can show you at least ), cameras absolutely VERBOTEN in the naked area (although I did bring mine in last time). After that we put on our matching fab Imperial Spa get ups (great Halloween costume actually) and explored the upstairs. This is me in my pink two piece suit, you get one at the front desk.



The upstairs area is co ed and you can enjoy some various degrees of hot areas like a salt room, a jade room, the red clay ball room and some other rooms that I can't recall now because I'm sleepy. We were balls deep as you can see. The clay balls feel especially great on the feet. I kind of miss them, I wish I had a hot red clay ball bed at home......I would use it for sure.





Sarah Jane in bed with all the balls. Just lovin' it!





Me lounging, waiting to get fed delicious chilled grapes and get a foot massage but nobody showed up.......WTF? That was not included in the $20 cover?



Sarah Jane investigating the complimentary penis gourd. Or whatever else those black tube looking things were for.....?



At the end we did as the spa suggests and cooled off in the ice room. I need to go back to the Imperial Spa again soon, not wait five years this time.







I'll be back!



Today because of Veterans Day (Thank You to all the veterans, especially my friends ❤ ) Red Rock was FREE. So me and Chhaya took advantage of that. Otherwise we go to Calico Basin, that's in Red Rock too and that is always free.



Tonight I met up with Mikey for dinner, we went to Paymon's (our spot) to indulge in the fries. Then we went to his place, Chhaya loves to visit "Uncle Mikey" and watched Magic Mike XXL.
It was kid of dull. My favorite was Amber Heard cause she is just gorgeous and when Joe Manganiello did his thing to NIN's Closer . You too should do that at home, surprise the lady in your life! SEKSI time afterwards guaranteed! After that we watched the latest episode of American Horror Story (Hotel). This series is based on a real life hotel in Los Angeles that used to be called Cecil Hotel, creepy stuff.....read about it! Me and Mikey were talking about maybe staying there.....maybe! I wanted to spend the night cause it was so cozy at Mikey's but I have some boring stuff that I have to do in the morning and needed to go home.

I'm laying here on my twin size air mattress that is situated in the living room, some laundry is drying, I have three more loads to do but that might have to wait until tomorrow because it's getting late. I just finished eating chips and salsa in "bed" or shall I say on my air mattress.
My day was spent doing errands, I did get a lot accomplished and that felt good.
I also picked up a bunch of dog poop in the park to make up for the other day when Chhaya pooped there but I did not have a doggie poop bag in my pocket to pick it up. I get like that.....I need to make up for stuff or I feel guilty. Last night I was so tired that I fell asleep with my make up on. It happened the other night too (tired again). I washed my face when I woke up today and said to myself that I will never again fall asleep with my make up on but yeah, it will most likely happen again. Does it really matter? Probably not. I like to take care of my skin though, moisturize and stuff. I have important stuff to take care of that I don't want to deal with, faxes to send and phone calls to make. My loan on my town home here in Las Vegas that I "own", really the bank owns the place (that is REALITY), is ridiculous. The place is not worth even close to what I bought it for.....I was very uneducated, naive and stupid (great combo) when I decided to purchase this place and trusted real estate agents and lenders thinking they had my best interest in mind.....HA HA did I learn my lesson! Now I'm sitting here wondering what the hell happened and why? Wishing I had never made the decision to buy any real estate then but I did.
I need to sweep the garage, scrub the patio, mop the kitchen floor. The truck needs an oil change. My body needs a long massage. For some weird reason I have broken four glass bottles in the last month, by accident of course. I can't recall the last time I broke a bottle (have I ever?) and I managed to break FOUR in a few weeks. Two ice tea bottles in my kitchen alone (the other two outside), I just picked up the glass and put a towel over the spilled tea......I need to mop but I don't feel like it. Maybe I'll mop tomorrow. I've read that many people don't like getting emails from people they know because it means that they have to answer.....just one more thing added on the to do list. I find that sad, how freaking disconnected people are getting. I recall when I used to write letters to my friends, you know hand written letters. I still do birthday cards and Thank You cards or smaller notes, I got two cards today for upcoming birthdays. Now it's text messages since so many people don't like to talk on the phone (I'm not one of them, I prefer talking actually) or Facebook messages (even those are difficult for some to respond to) or even better and easier just "likes" on Facebook, anything else is too time consuming for most. People seem to keep in touch less and less and friendships, some of the most precious things one can have, dry up and die. Liking something on Facebook is not keeping in touch, in case you didn't know that.



Speaking of Facebook, everybody knows that people lie on Facebook aka Fakebook (if you don't believe me, look it up). I understand some lies, to protect your identity etc, I lie like that too. But people lie about books they haven't read, saying they read them just to appear more......more what? Interesting? Or posting all kinds of fabricated and exaggerated stuff to make their friends and families jealous. I think that is disgusting, to try to make others jealous on purpose. There is no excuse for that unless you are a child or an immature teenager.
And what friends are we talking about exactly? The handful of REAL friends that they have that can see through that utter bullshit, because the real friends know the TRUTH (HA HA) or the hundreds of fake friends people gather to desperately appear more popular than they are. When people ask me if I have Facebook I say no, or that I only have it for my few friends (REAL ones) and family because that is the truth. It's nothing personal but my Mom is my Facebook friend, my brother and my cousins and people that have known me since I was seven years old......I don't need much more than that on there, plus a handful of other people that I consider friends that I actually spent time with in real life. I have no need in collecting 'friends". I would never post anything to try to make somebody jealous, here on the blog or on Facebook. I don't put up a whole lot on Facebook anyways, the blog is what gets it all.
I've noticed that nobody wants to get engaged too much in anything serious on Facebook, it's a rather shallow level on there and that's fine with me. Sometimes I don't go in there for weeks. Here I can write on and on about women and Islam, animal cruelty and assholes in general. Vent about work. Praise Burning Man.
I'm excited because I have a new whole list of books that I want. Books that look very promising! Some people like reading, others don't. I need to read, I love it. A while back somebody criticized me in a comment here on the blog asking me why I had not read 1984 by George Orwell yet. I could had lied.....LOL....and said "but of course I've read it and bla bla bla". Actually my intention was to get it and bring it to Burning Man this year (I had a vision of me reading 1984 during my morning latte time in Center Camp) but that did not happen. I got it after Burning Man and it is now in my possession and I am saving it for next years Burning Man. I don't mind critique, I can take it. I might listen if it's valid but if it's just dumb shit then I won't care. Like, you think I'm a bitch for example. OK, great.....good for you plus HIGH FIVE and YES I am a bitch (proudly so may I add), probably one of the most honest bitches you will ever know. Trust me, if I have something bad to say about you behind your back you already know it because I have told you to your face. I don't pretend.
Back to books, I am about to re read Bad Feminist by Roxanne Gay. It's a GREAT book, I highly recommend it. And I've got the latest issue of Adbusters today just so I can think even more about what a meaningless and shallow life I live......I need to do something of true meaning soon.



Back to my life, my glamorous life, or not so glamorous.....I'm trying to be as honest as possible here on the blog about it. I will write about sadness, difficult times, tears, that I sometimes don't want to get up out of bed and start my day because I feel a heavy anxiety in my chest, outbreaks on my butt, ingrown hairs but also when I am happy and feel alive, when I have something exciting to tell or show, even if it's a new nail polish. My thoughts and opinions. Having said that.....I might not, actually I won't share EVERYTHING, some things are private. BUT I am not going to make up stuff or make stuff sound better than it is just to try to make people "jealous".....no, I'm not lame like that.
Right now I am sleeping on an air mattress and my stuff has been in a suit case and bagged up in various bags for months. I've been living out of a suit case and plastic bins for almost a year. Most of my stuff is packed up. I have mostly been re using the same clothes for a year not bothering digging in the bins for what I packed away. I don't even know what I have anymore. Well, I did put some of my clothes in my closet today, I had to organize the suitcase and the bins. Half of the contents of my suitcase were mixed up on the floor for days, hence the laundry this evening. I got new cute socks today too.



What else can I share? Hmmmmm.......well, besides all of the stuff I already told you I still have a runny nose and a throat full of mucous. But in general I feel happy but a bit overwhelmed with too many responsibilities and too much on my own to do list. I need to rest and sleep and get well. I am meeting up with some friends the next couple of days and I'm looking forward to that. I miss my friends in Sweden......for some reason they don't lie on their Facebook, how strange......really not strange at all, it's Sweden after all. I need to pee right now and I will wash my face tonight. Goodnight!