Entries by TATIANA

Welcome to Chaos !!

Friday, May 16. 2014

Ash

The fog is gone and the sun is shining again. If I ever move away from here, I will miss the long summer days (when it's nice) with the light that lingers around, I love that. I was busy with errands today, Chhaya joined in. Of course I always park in the shade when the sun is out and I have a pillow for her to rest her head on if she wants to. She likes to stare down people and excitedly bark at every dog she sees. Plus she gets treats every time I go to Kaladi, so doing errands is usually a fun adventure.



This is my latest shoe buy. I got them in Vegas, ASH shoes. I have been wanting a pair for about a year, so I don't think I qualify for being considered an impulsive buyer. First I couldn't decide whether to go with a blue pair or a pink pair. Then I saw some black ones with a few bright colors, a more sporty design. In the end, I went with beige suede. I love them. They look super cute and sleek on. Still haven't worn them. They are in the closet waiting for the right occasion.



I'm staying in tonight. I promised Chhaya some quality time. That means play hide and seek, lots of cuddles and belly rubs. And she is getting her ears cleaned and teeth brushed.
Better get started.

Wednesday, May 14. 2014

Boko Haram

Let me try to put together another blog entry with some substance to it so I can prove to ya'll that I'm not stupid, before I start writing about pink nail polish and Hello Kitty again..... ;-)
Today I want to touch on Boko Haram and the kidnapped girls in Nigeria. Those were girls that went to school, they were abducted because the leader of Boko Haram and his followers do not believe in "Western" education, since it's evil according to them. I'm suspecting that they also think that women in general are below men, have no rights, their life should consist of taking care of the household as in cooking, cleaning and sexually be available to your husband (starting from a young age) and give birth to lots of children, preferably boys.
The leader of Boko Haram made a statement that Allah has instructed him to abduct the girls and sell them on the market. "I will sell women. I sell women". The men that are in Boko Haram consider themselves to be be devout holy men. Other notable things that the leader of Boko Haram has said, "Until we soak the ground of Nigeria with Christian blood and so called Muslims contradicting Islam. After we have killed, killed, killed, and get fatigue and wondering what to do with their corpses - smelling of Obama, Bush and Goodluck - will open prison and be imprison the rest. Infidels have no value."
So according to some devout and holy men of Islam like the members of Boko Haram and such, I (since I do not affiliate myself with Islam) deserve to be killed. They would probably torture me for a long time first because I am a bad woman, showing my body shamelessly and having opinions. Wonderful. I was under the impression that Islam is a "religion of peace"? How come then that so many kill and destroy in the name of Allah? I still have to understand that, can't wrap my head around that fact.
I think the schoolgirls should be rescued, (searches are ongoing) absolutely! The countries in Africa that are being harassed and ran by idiots like these men should be getting sanctioned and boycotted by the world, no more monetary aid that will fund their armies with weapons that kill innocent people. Stop sending money to countries like these!
And since I do not want to come of as an Islamophobe, because I'm not.....I'm just bringing up facts, let me bring up another example of women held against their will in the name of God.
I saved an article I read in a magazine from last year about a Rebecca Musser that at 19 was married off to an 85 year old "prophet" of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. Yes, these practices are ongoing in Utah in today's USA. Young girls are brought up, brainwashed and forced to marry men that are old enough to be their great grandfathers. All they do it cook, clean, work and give birth. They can't pick out what they want to wear, they have to wear long skirts and keep their hair long and up. Similar to when certain countries that affiliate with the more stricter teachings of Islam decide that women have to cover up from head to toe. Rebecca managed to escape that life and I am happy that she did. Noteworthy is that Warren Jeffs, a former FLDS leader had 80 wives, some as young as 12 and 15. What a grown man wants to do sexually to a 12 and 15 year old that have no possibility of protesting the fact that some old dude is about to mount her is mind-blowing to me.
Warren Jeffs and several other men from FLDS are now in prison where they belong and where they should sit until they draw their last breath.
All human are born free, at least they should be born free. Women have a fully functioning brain (in case you didn't know this) and are meant to live their lives to the fullest, not to be somebody's subservient slave.
Organized religion enslaves people. I do think that there is value to SOME of the Ten Commandments, although I could add some of my own Commandments to the mix but everybody that is not a sociopath should understand this, the understanding of that comes from a place within of morals and ethics.
And while I am of the topic of religion.....The current suggested boycott of the Beverly Hills hotel because it's owner the sultan of Brunei has imposed Sharia law in his country.
Boycott or no boycott? Duh, boycott of course! I stay at Motel 6 when I'm in Hollywood, it's cheap, close to everything I need and I can bring Chhaya, what else can I ask for? Sharia law on the citizens while the sultan and the royal family live a life far removed from any such Sharia lifestyle? Screams double standard! The Beverly Hills hotel has long been known for scouting women that are willing to prostitute themselves for cash and jewelry in Brunei to the men in the "royal" family. Please, there are so many stories out there about that and
"Porta-Potty" girls and all that stuff. And yes, I read "Some Girls, My Life in a Harem" by Jillian Lauren, I wrote a blog about that a long time ago (on July 9 2010). Do I believe her? Yes.
Sharia law does not belong in the today's world. And let me add another bit of my personal opinion before I log off. I think when you are as wealthy as the sultan of Brunei (and others that have significant wealth) it should be your MORAL DUTY to practice acts of kindness and altruism to help the world to become a better place instead of worrying about shit like having a house with 1000+ rooms and more cars than you know what to do with.
If you believe in God, you should know this, "Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God."
VERY TRUE!



Tuesday, May 13. 2014

Gay

I do not watch football.....I don't know anything about football. I'm referring to American football now, not what we call football in Sweden (fotboll). I always thought that American football was confusing, not much happening besides large men laying on top of each other or running short distances (I think). But I guess football is the national sport (I checked recent statistics). So I caught some footage of the first openly gay guy in football, Michael Sam and I thought it was very touching. He got the news that he was drafted, with his boyfriend by his side. I almost cried. And they shared a little kiss, CUUUUTE! But OH MY GAAAAAAWD what reactions it evoked! So, showing violence and murder on TV is OK but not a quick kiss, out of love? What will the poor children think? Let them watch a violent show instead where some dude is chopping up people, much better!
I guess football is a very macho sport and being gay is still looked at as something disgusting and wrong by many guys. Those are the same guys that would love to have sex with two hot lesbians and think that hot lesbian porn is great. Lesbians, only if hot on a male hetero scale = great but men that are gay, oh no that is not OK. Double standards much?
I am, if you maybe missed out on this bit of information so far......very open minded. I don't care whether you are gay, straight, twisted whatever.....as long as you are a good person in general. I can tell you this much.....I'd much rather be around a bunch of gay guys than some straight guys that might think it's OK to rape me, just because they can. How often do you hear of a female rapist out there lurking in the bushes so she can knock some innocent man unconscious and rape him? Or do you ever hear of random gay guys that pray on straight guys? Not that I can think of. Sure there might be a few cases, if you dig around for them.
On the other hand, I hear of rape and sexual assault hetero man on woman all the time.
Guys rape each other in prison too, straight, gay - it doesn't matter when you are locked up and horny, right? I guess it's OK to be gay in prison, some guys seem to think so. Different rules in prison.
I am SO grateful for gay guys and how some of them have brightened my life with their presence, they glitterfy and beautify the world. One such time that stands out in my head was when Carson Kressley was on Dancing With The Stars and danced to Moves Like Jagger.
Best ever! I just wanted to crawl into the TV, hug him and ask him to be my best friend.
I absolutely love Carson. I love RuPaul. Keoki (always). And the list goes on......Carson if you read this.....let's have afternoon tea at the Four Season and chat!
You might think gay sex is gross or sinful. Well, I think that two people can do whatever they want with each other, if it's consensual of course. People like to bring up religion when they pontificate their opinions about gays. Well, if God was so against gays, he would had never made them. I think that you are born gay. Nobody wants the problems that come with being gay. It's much easier to be straight in society. Gays get harassed and even killed on an everyday basis, who wants that? So if God was so much against gays, everybody would had been born straight. Less problems.
There are so many worse things I can think of than being gay. How about being a child molester? Or a rapist? Or an animal abuser?
I heard that some dumb ass came into the club I work at a few weeks ago and loudly called a guy he doesn't even know, sitting at the bar minding his own business, "fag". I happen to know who both are. The dumb ass is a large bully that needs to work on his education, worry about himself and shut the fuck up. The other guy seems to be a nice person and doesn't appear gay to me but even if he is.....SO FUCKING WHAT?! It's good that I was not around to hear that because I would had loudly intervened. I am very sensitive to stuff like that. If you try to, in any shape or form, harass or hurt somebody (uncalled for) when I am around I will step in. I don't care if you are bigger than me, bring it!
You know what, you can be against gays or whatever.....that is your prerogative. We all have opinions......I know this, I have PLENTY about almost everything. Let your opinions flow when you vent with your buddies while doing something macho such as having some brewskis and talking about women and our body parts. Or write a blog! But to bully, harass or use violence to get your (in my opinion narrow minded and backwards) views across.....that is NOT OK.
I remember when I was 16 and went to my first gay club. I was in heaven! Great music, cute boys everywhere and no annoying motherfuckers sneaking up from behind thrusting their half hard penises against my ass (I call them dickthrusters), thinking that is how they will get my attention. That is how you will get my foot in your crotch if anything.
I'm not saying that all straight guys are horrible rapists and bad guys in general and that all gay guys are some innocent lambs with this entry. Of course not, I know better than that. Being a good person has nothing to do with your sexual preferences.

Fog

The fog rolled in yesterday evening and it hasn't left. I live relatively close to the beach, so it gets foggy here sometimes. It looks like a Twilight movie outside, kind of mysterious......maybe Edward will show up here tonight. He could take me flying through the forest. I have been tired all day, like an old grandma that gets affected by the weather.
I forced myself to do the dishes and go for a long walk with Chhaya, she has lots of energy as usual. I could had curled up under a pine tree and took a nap, I can sleep anywhere.
It's getting to be late here, I am still up, no TV channels I guess the fog is affecting the service. I might run a bath and wash my hair.
I hope you are having a good night wherever you might be......!



Monday, May 12. 2014

Mandy

I met Mandy when I was in Winner, South Dakota last year. She was the first girl I saw when I walked into the dressing room. She had cut her VAGINE while shaving and was worried about blood on her white panties. I sized up my competition and decided that indeed Mandy was competition material, nice looking and in shape. I almost showed her my sharp fangs to establish dominance but then we started talking and we are still talking to this day. She was kind of funny, see she wanted to give me her number before she left Winner to go home but was too shy or something.....? So she had a guy in the club give it to me instead, he told me that she wanted me to have her number but didn't want me to think that she was a weirdo. What? LOL. I texted Mandy the next day and told her that I did not at all think that she was weird. Now we have almost daily text conversations about all kinds of stuff, we share many opinions and laugh at the same stuff.....and she leaves comments on my blog. I like that!
This is Mandy. My new friend......!



Of course she has a face too, a nice looking one I have to add. But until I see her again (if I do) and maybe take a pic of her or with her, this is the only pic of Mandy in the blog for now.





Local News



What are the local news in my neck of the woods....you might wonder? Besides that Tatiana is looking fabulous and amazing and bla bla bla......but that is nothing new. That's just an everyday fact, so get used to it.
Well, here are some news from the past week. As usual, a small plane crash. It seems like there is a small plane crash in Alaska on a weekly basis, some with deadly outcome.
Granted there are a lot of those small planes here, many people have a pilot license in Alaska. I have been a passenger in those small planes or bush planes several times but I never felt fully comfortable, I always felt uneasy and very relived when back on the ground. I went on shorter trips, flying over Anchorage or from Anchorage to Eagle River but I also took a few longer trips. Chhaya even joined me twice, she was very baffled at first and stared through the window at the ground below with a wild look in her eyes but I think she kind of liked it. But I decided that flying in those small bush planes is an adventure that is not suited for me. Other things that I'm totally OK with never experiencing in my life is jumping out of an airplane for fun, bungee jumping, hot air balloon ride - NO thanks.
It's scary enough to be on the airplane from Kenai to Anchorage, that one seats 20 I think and that's small in my opinion.
Then we have the bears. Black and brown bears are done with hibernating and are out and about. Polar bears are always out and about but they are so far North that they don't concern me. Have I ever seen bears? Yes. A few times. Once I saw a Mama bear and three cubs, super cute. Another time a large brown bear was walking slowly on the side of the highway in Cooper Landing, I could had petted it from the passenger side of the car if I had stuck my hand out the window. I've seen a few more bears but most of them from far away and that's a good thing. I also went to Brooks Falls a few years ago and that was AMAZING. You stand on platforms and watch the bears catching salmon in the river. Bears are really cute, they look like large dogs. You want to pet them but of course, that's not a good idea.
And then the issue with Native Alaskans in the villages and suicide. I guess Alaska is topping the suicide statistic (per capita) in the US. Also topping statistics here are fetal alcohol syndrome, molesting children, rape, sexual assault and violence against women (reported cases). "Fun" facts huh? I don't know what to say about the Alaska Natives and suicide. I'm not a Native and I have no clue to how it is to live in a remote village. But I think that if it's that miserable then maybe relocating might be a good idea? I know that in Anchorage there are so many Natives just being drunk and homeless. Some Natives seem to have a serious problem with alcohol, therefore some of the remote villages here in the state are "dry".
Meaning alcohol is prohibited there. Or they are supposed to be dry and drug free but people bring in alcohol and drugs to the villages all the time. A bottle of alcohol is expensive there and you can make a profit selling alcohol in the villages. I can imagine that it's easier to make the decision to commit suicide if you are under the influence of alcohol. In the article it says that about half the suicides in the state involve alcohol. It also says that the ban on alcohol in villages has failed to reduce the suicide rate. Well, I don't know then. I don't have anything to comment on the topic of suicide. Life can be hard. I wish it wasn't so.
Alcohol in general is the reason why some people do and say crazy things that they would never do or say when sober. I have been around enough people acting like total asses when drunk and saying the most ridiculous and dumb shit. Alcohol is an explanation to irrational behavior but not an excuse.

Here are some pics from my own and Chhaya's Alaskan adventure.