Your New President

Last year while strolling through the Miracle Mile Shops at Plannet Hollywood in Las Vegas I came across this paper figure of President Trump and this podium.



I thought that was GREAT and put on a one woman comedy show for a few minutes to my own amusement and also the person working there (he did laugh and said I was very funny, I KNOW I am- Thank You). I have been told I should do comedy more than once.
Anyhow....I wanted another pic last week so I went back. No President Trump is sight! What? After asking for the whereabouts of the President I found out that Potus and Flotus where hiding in the back because random people walking by could not deal with their anger after seeing a paper figure of President Trump. Ummmmm what? Up your meds people, up your meds.
So this is Vegas after all where probably one third (at least) of the people strolling by are high on something or have some liquor in them. Perhaps they got that liquor courage in them, that is why they opened their mouths in the first place.
I am one of those weirdos that don't need liquor to loudly speak my mind.
So I took a pic with just me on the podium this time. Actually even better! Folks....(you reading this) meet your new President. ME.
Trump has decided to go on Christmas break.....until further notice. Melania and little Barron want him all to themselves for a while. No more late night tweets to entertain and horrify the masses and I need to go over and probably restore the list of words and phrases banned to be used by the CDC (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention). Last time I checked I was in United States of America, not North Korea so let's keep it that way, shall we? Yes Trump is a bit tired, it's been a hectic year. He is only human after all and needs some time off.
Plus Omarosa quit (or did she get fired like when she was on the Apprentice?) and with her gone there is an urgent NEED for another strong, opinionated woman in the White House. And I can speak a few more languages besides English, so when I meet and schmooze with other leaders of the world I will be able to carry on just fine. I can even curse in Arabic! Plus I can say I love you honey in Arabic as well. And I know the word for money. Perfect!
I especially can't wait to meet Putin! Love connection perhaps? ❤
Don't worry people of the world. I will Make America Great Again.....all I am asking for are two lattes a day and a daily massage. Chhaya wants free roam of the White House lawn, she will make a great First Pet since she is an American pit bull terrier after all. I am packing my IKEA duffel bags and boarding Air Force One heading for 1600 Pennsylvania Ave Washington D.C. any day now.