Welcome to Chaos !!

Again, The New Yorker made a mistake. But as always, Tatiana is here to correct the mistakes made. It is good that YOU know Tatiana, how else would you be able to find out what's really going on?
Tatiana LOVES House music, basically electronica, Techno, but especially House. Oh yumminess! House has been around for a long time and according to The New Yorker it was kind of gone (???) but is now back due to songs like Lady Gaga's "Just Dance" and Kanye West's "Flashing Lights". Seriously? First of all, House never left and probably never will. It was just not "trendy" to go to raves and clubs that played this kind of music and it was more of an underground movement. Which is good by the way! It has been more trendy to go to lame ass clubs, like all the big clubs in Las Vegas for example, meat market atmosphere, full off annoying drunks, sipping on some spiffy drinks while listening to the latest top 40. If posing and trying to look important while texting on a cell is fun, then go to a club. And stay there please!
But if you want to enjoy life and dance your ass off, not worrying about anything else, then welcome to Tatianas kind of party.
She has been going to her raves for years now. Not only her. Monster Massive, Together As One, Electric Daisy Carnival are raves/parties that attract thousands of electronica music fans yearly, we are talking numbers like 20 000 - 40 000, at one party. And Tatiana can almost guarantee that most of the attendees would not be there unless there was House and Techno pumping out of the speakers. The best time, EVER.
Back to Lady Gaga and Kanye, these songs mentioned are hardly even close to House music, more pop. The use of a synthesizer doesn't make a song a House song. Tatiana likes Lady Gaga, she is refreshing but she wouldn't go as far as calling the songs she has heard from her to fit in the House music category.

Another thing that kind of fits in here. Paris Hilton had some commotion at a club recently. She went to a club during Winter Music Conference in Miami, a yearly electronica music event that draws some of the best dj's in the world. She probably forgot that she was attending a club were top 40 was not going to be played, she is confused and somewhat dumb, we all know that. She decided to go up to the dj and started telling him to change the music, she was getting "a migraine" supposedly. Whatever, leave then you dumb cow! The dj, Steve Angello, a guy from Sweden, probably thought she was notally nuts, which she is. A scuffle occurred, I hope he sues her ass. Steve knows how to dj, Tatiana is a witness to that. Paris needs to shut up and get busy with working on her tan and take care of her pets instead of bothering people that are trying to enjoy themselves.

The ashes from the happy Alaska volcano are under control, life is back to normal for now. Tatiana did some errands today and ate lots of food.
Enjoy the pic capturing Together As One, a great event.

So Tatiana just thought of something that happened at work last night while she was on the stage. We dance two songs on the stage, in case you don't know.
There was this obnoxious and to put in mildly, not attractive woman sitting at the stage. Pulling down her shirt to show the whole club that she had two dollars stuck inside her fat cleavage. Thinking that Tatiana would go and dig those dollars up with her perfectly glossed lips. First of all, Tatiana does not take dollars in her mouth. That is yucky and totally passe. Maybe that was hot in the early 90's. Not anymore.
We get this a lot. Women that come in to the club and think that we, the dancers, should be all over them, wanting to make out with them and feel them up just because they are women in the stripclub. Um, NO.
Then the lady, removed the dollars from her sweaty cleavage and started waving them around in the air, making sexy faces at Tatiana and putting her hand inside the stage. Creepy. Tatiana can be mean at times, and she will ignore any stupid behavior. Had this lady been more normal, Tatiana would had payed her attention. Besides, there was a nice guy at the stage tipping four 20's and a 5, that was more interesting plus all the other guys sitting there.
Tatiana sees naked girls all the time, if she was going to make out with a girl she would make out with a HOT girl. Like Britney (Spears that is), or Megan Fox or Gisele.

Here is a pic of Gisele Bundchen. Tatiana likes pretty, modely looking girls, pretty from head to toe.

Well, it finally happened........not that Tatiana is thrilled about it or anything...... but the ashes from Mount Redoubt's eruptions finally blew to Anchorage.
Tatianas day started off normal, she got up early to get a pedicure. Her toenails were getting way too long. Though last night somebody admired Tatianas feet and called them "high society feet". LOL.
After the pedi, color pick grey sparkly steele in case you are curious, Tatiana went to eat at Middle Way Cafe, very good as always. Then a quick stop at the mall to pick up something from the MAC counter. After that Tatiana took Chhaya out for a walk. Then she got ready for work........
Pulling in to the parking lot she saw that there were no cars outside the club, a note on the door said that the club was closed due to the ashes from the volcano. Oh no! Tatiana shaved and lotioned up for nothing! No work tonight.......
So then Tatiana decided to go and get some groceries because who knows how long these ashes will lay around. You're not even supposed to be driving around.
BAH! Annoying!
Tatiana is spending the night at home, tv, ice cream, chips, cookies, tea and Chhaya.

So what's new in the "celebrity" world? Tatiana knows you are just dying to find out. Hmmmmmm, ok here we go.......
Hot, naughty sexpot Jenna Jameson gave birth to twin boys. Proud Papa is Tito Ortiz, big muscle guy and UFC fighter. When Jenna was asked if she would let her daughter, if she ever has one, do porn, she answered that she would lock her up in the closet. Wonder if she would lock up her boys if they wanted to do porn? Still, Tatiana likes Jenna. Go Jenna!
Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer broke up. Again. Hopefully for good this time. He is just creepy Tatiana thinks. Really big head. Ben Affleck too has a big head and is creepy. But what do women see in John Mayer? Tatiana doesn't see it at all. He is just not that cute. Or anything else for that matter. Jennifer Aniston is better off without him. Being alone is better than being with him.
Britney is on tour, the tour is called "Circus", just like her latest album. Britney looks fantastic! Tatiana LOVES Britney!
Lindsey Lohan and Samantha Ronson are still fighting and loving each other. Awesomely dysfunctional. They are great, Tatiana would like to go clubbing with them. Maybe next time she is in LA.
Madonna and her new boyfriend Jesus. Funny name combo here. Jesus and Madonna. Match made in Heaven. So what that she is 50 and he is 22? Nobody is saying anything when an old geezer is stepping out with a hot, young girl. Hypocrites! Get with the times, it's 2009 you fogbones!
Rihanna and Chris Brown abuse scandal. Ok, Tatiana feels for Rihanna. It's not easy to get out of a relationship when you think you love somebody, even when there is abuse involved. Chris Brown looks just like a chimp whereas Rihanna is super pretty. And chimps are violent, remember? Tatiana would be angry too if her bf had an affair with his much older manager. Rihanna is the prettiest girl he will ever have.
The Octomom. Disgusting. She looks grotesque and swollen. And if she has more kids Tatiana will petition so that lady will be forced to have her tubes tied. 14 kids, what was she thinking? Oh, that's right......she wasn't.
Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston are not getting married after all. No, say it ain't so! Really? Sarah was just talking about a wedding while out on the campaign trail so she would not lose face. If they really wanted to get married they would had done so before Bristol squeezed Tripp out. Btw Tatiana heard a rumor months ago that little Levi was providing OxyContins in his high school. Don't know if there's any truth to that. But his Mom is currently awaiting trial on drug charges. Coincidence?
And who still wants Sarah for a potential president in four years? Oh, horrific thought! Tatiana is way better equipped for presidency than Sarah.
Vote for Tatiana NOW!!!

My friend Amber went to the animal shelter yesterday and rescued an adult male pitbull. To me, that makes her an angel. Rescuing a dog is a very nice thing to do. He is such a cutie! And he looks a lot like Chhaya, he is a blue nose too. Maybe they can become good friends?

Sitting at Kennedys house, watching Twilight..........mmmmmmmm........... Fantasizing about steamy hot make out sessions with sexy vampire boys.
Tatiana and Kennedy NEEDS!!!
Actually, the sequel to Twilight, New Moon, is being filmed in Vancouver right now. Tatiana is seriously thinking about packing a suitcase and going down there for a few weeks. She wants to run into Edward/Robert and hopefully make out with him. Maybe Kennedy can come with her?