Bruised Ego & A Rainy New York

Well, since my voice is almost gone due to my cold I decided not to work. It's difficult to talk and it would be next to impossible to communicate with anyone in a loud club. Plus I get intense sneeze and cough attacks that make my eyes tear up, that wouldn't be too fun to get while on stage or during a dance, I hope I feel better tomorrow.
So my ego is somewhat bruised after the "rejection" at Flashdancers. I worked there years ago and I liked it, did well and was liked by management. So of course I didn't think I wouldn't get hired this time around. You have to audition on stage. There were so many girls there, the dressing room is almost impossible to move around in, it is not large enough for all the girls and their stuff. No lockers, your bag and shoes are basically on shelves and on the floor. Well, the manager told me that he is not hiring right now because there are too many girls due to the holiday season. He said MAYBE after the holidays.......MAYBE......
😥
And sent to over to their other club, Private Eyes a few blocks away and told me I could work there, so I walked over there.
Private Eyes was not like Flashdancers......at all. Actually about 15 girls got sent there last night from Flashdancers because they did have too many girls, so I know he wasn't lying about the too many girls issue. But still, I did audition on stage, nothing crazy in this club, most girls just kind of move around slowly and sexy, looking blasé ,no fast dancing at all. And then he said no. I think that if he really would had "liked" me, he would have hired me, despite of the too many girls factor. Hmmmmmm, so yes I am disappointed. I got a good look at some of the girls at Flashdancers and there were similar to the ones at Private Eyes, lots of Russians and Eastern Europeans, I met a girl from the Czech Republic and one from Turkey. And there were a few very pretty ones at both clubs but far from every girl was gorgeous, either skinny body and bad face or kind of normal looking body in "stripper standards". Nobody larger sized that I saw.
A normal body in stripper standards is not really the same as a normal body would be for "regular" women, just like the top models don't have bodies that look like regular women's bodies. Or maybe I should use the word average here. The average woman's body.
There was one very beautiful girl from Estonia at Private Eyes and one more that stood out look wise, the rest were ok, some had bad faces. Most girls looked depressed and didn't smile and it was a slow night. Management were all nice and did say that it was a bad night. One girl told me that last week she had three nights when she made $ 1000 and she looked average to me, she was the Turkish girl. I don't know if she is telling the truth or not, maybe.
I also got a long dress today, a purple pretty dress with a rhinestone buckle. The shop didn't have a fitting room. Really? How are you going to sell dancer outfits to girls and NOT have a fitting room? Lame. But when I tried it on later in my room I was happy with it.
So instead of working I went out in the night, had a bite to eat and strolled around in a rainy New York. It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas around here, many decorations and lights up.
It's pretty. I am going to do some more shopping tomorrow in the daytime.