Welcome to Chaos !!

Today me and Chhaya went to the beach for a walk. But first I had to swing by the post office and send some packages. I like to spoil my friends and family.......My whole yard is still covered by snow. Underneath that snow there is grass that I want to feel in between my toes.



It was......still is really nice out today. Me and Chhaya spent about one hour at the beach. Now Chhaya is sunbathing on the deck outside and I am feeling tired and unsure about what I am doing tonight. I woke up a little bit before 8 am, got a phone call and then I had to take care of some stuff after that, annoying. So that is why I am tired now. If my sleep gets interrupted I feel tired later on.
My nail polish already chipped, so I have to take that off. Going with solid gray next in case you want to know. I want to find Hello Kitty nail stickers and put those on my nails combined with a light pink polish. That will be my next nail project.

I am finally in bed and keeping me company tonight before I go to sleep is this book, new to my personal library. I love reading. If you can appreciate a book you are never alone. As soon as I learned how to read I always had a book handy. And I read tons of magazines too, anything from gossip and fashion to political and news. Well......time to enjoy this novel.

APRIL FOOL'S YA'LL! ME stop writing my blog? I have too many fans, too much to say and too much fun to stop....... So it is blogging business as usual here.......you can all breathe a huge sigh of relief now. Tatiana is back and she is not going anywhere.......at least for now.
Wanted to show you my latest exciting and super glam shopping. Wax, look it says extra strength! That should be able to rip out my long dark hairs on my thighs. It is time to wax that. And Neutrogena body wash, the one that smells like pink grapefruit (supposedly) and contains salicylic acid. Sometimes I break out on my butt. NOT SEKSI. I have sensitive skin on my fabulous behind and I keep it clean with Neutrogena.
You should wash yourself with something that will keep your breakouts in check, if you get any. That is my tip. Oh and once in a while I give myself a total germ extermination treatment with Hibiclens. A doctor that I met at work actually told me about Hibiclens,
I guess it can be used as a surgical scrub. Yes, I like to keep clean......I love taking baths and going to spas. And since I work in an environment that can be questionable when it comes to germs and other people's hygiene, I make sure that at least I am clean.

Hi all the readers of my amazing and fun blog, whoever you are.......! Last month I had 30 000 readers......the blog is growing, it's like my little baby. I only had a visitor counter this last year, so I don't know how many readers I had before that........



I wonder sometimes who you are and how you found me. HELLOOOOOOO, WHO ARE YOU? 🙂 Of course I know how some of you found me, by me telling you about my blog or you knowing me personally. But I just wanted to say thank you for reading, it is a fun feeling knowing that people read what I have to say. You don't have to agree with what I say and my opinions, you don't have to like me.......I am totally ok with that. I like myself and I am myself my biggest fan.......LOL. Sound funny maybe but it is true.
Know Thyself.
With that said......thank you for reading and goodbye. I have decided after some consideration to stop blogging. Everything must come to an end. Even the good things. XOXO from your favorite Tatiana. ❤

Went down to the beach to catch the last sun rays of this month. March 31 already.......It has been three months since New Years Eve, the months went by fast huh? Did you make any New Years resolutions and stuck to them? Have you done anything special? Anything good?
I did not make any resolutions, I stopped doing that a long time ago. What I can say is that I think my life is kind of boring and stagnant right now, although I am healthy and mostly happy and for that I am very grateful, that I want to point out because those are things that are priceless but I still wish for some kind of a positive change of direction for my own life in 2013. And that might come. If not, then......it will come sooner or later. Change always happens and is always looming around the corner, whether it is for better or worse. What I do have to look forward to is my trip to Chicago in May and experiencing (finally) Burning Man in August.
Well, the last sunset of March 2013. Sunsets make me a little melancholic. I feel small in comparison to the sun, the ocean, the sky.......nature. And I usually miss my family and my friends, often wondering if they too look at the sunset........and think of me.

So the other night while I was sitting and talking to some people at work a guy told me, "You are alllllll about business". I didn't even protest just kind of brushed it off you know. If I would allow myself to get fired up by everything I witness at work
(bad behavior, girls breaking rules CONSTANTLY, guys acting like total asses etc etc) then I would be walking around in a constant stage of irritation. Maybe that's why some people drink or smoke weed on a daily basis, to take that edge off but I am sober.
This guy obviously doesn't know me, although he did mention that he reads my blog.
To my surprise another girl at work told him about my blog. He probably doesn't read on an everyday basis which is fine btw, cause if he did he would know that I am not all about business.
Don't get me wrong. I work so I can support myself, it costs money to live. I am not a house wife that gets taken care of by the husband. I mean YOU go to work also so you can pay your bills, put food on your table and take care of all your other expenses, right? I know of plenty of people that absolutely HATE their jobs but they work because they have to. So yes, work is business. I live in a small town (right now) and there is not much to do here. I do not like going to any of the other bars around here and hang out so I might as well go to work and make money, right? If I was in Vegas still or any other city where there is a plethora of night clubs, restaurants, shows and various sources of entertainment then I would much rather enjoy any of those other options than go in to the strip club for a night of work. I work so I can make money, yes I do. But I don't hate my job, actually it can be rather fun.
See the girl this guy was sitting with was going to lunch with him the next day,
I happened to sit next to them when they talked about it and he invited me join and I (politely) declined. So that automatically made me "all about business". Trust me, I am probably the girl that is the least about business in the club. LOL. But I am not going to go to any lunches, dates, give out my number or get random guy's fingers dug up in between my ass cheeks while doing dances because that kind of business is not the business that I conduct. I much rather not have that money.
Do not be fooled you guy that thinks that I am all about business. If the girl you took to lunch was NOT about business then she would not have allowed you spend any money on dances from her the other night. I didn't even ask you for a dance. And when I do dances I don't aggressively push for another dance like some girls do. I am not saying it is good or bad, I am only making a point.
Of course I go into work (and my place of work happens to be a strip club) to make money, I like having good nights but it is not all about business with me, if it was I would be acting like a total slut at work (like sadly many of my co workers do) just to make as much money as I can......and I don't. See? So no, I am not ALL about business.
I am all about not bending any of my comfort levels at work and at the same time make money. I occasionally decline dances. If a person seems to have bad hygiene I will not traumatize myself be giving them a lap dance. No way. Or if a person is too grabby or aggressive. No thanks. Or give dances to a boyfriend's friend or relative. Also dancing for a friends boyfriend/husband/Dad while the friend is not present. That is creepy and speaks volumes about integrity.
I turned down some money last night. We have a couple that comes in to the club a lot, sometimes together and sometimes separately. The guy used to do some work for the club and the girl is currently employed by the club (not as a dancer). I feel like they are my friends although I don't hang out with them outside of the club. I was asked to dance for them last night but I just couldn't. NOT because they are smelly or gross in any kind of way. It is the other way around, they are both good looking, the girl is a knock out. BUT I feel like I KNOW them and dancing for him or her would only feel kind of funny and I would only be shy. So I told him to keep his money and gave him a hug instead. Every situation has a different dynamic, of course I sometimes give dances to people that come in to the club on a regular basis and that I feel like I have a friendship with but I still dance for them. Do I make sense?

That is all for me this Sunday. It is noon. My phone rang BEFORE 11 and woke me up. Note to people out there, do not call a dancer before 11 am unless it is something very urgent that can't wait. I usually don't go to sleep until anytime between 4 and 6 and I need and love my sleep........