Welcome to Chaos !!

Yesterday afternoon me, Chhaya and the new friend I made Desi took a drive to McKenzie pass. It was going to be a full moon and I wanted to watch the sunset and the moonrise in a nice spot so I suggested we go there. To get to McKenzie Pass (elevation 5325 ft.) you take Highway 242, it is very scenic and once you get up the mountain a bit you will see a spectacular scenery, a lava field.





Me and Desi.



Since we had some time before the sun was setting we drove to a lake, Scott Lake and had some snacks.



KIND bars for us and a RUFF bar for Chhaya.







It started hailing, then lighting and thunder hit close by us.....almost right where we were. SUPER loud! Not everyday you get that close to lighting....so that was an experience.





The we drove back up to the summit. There is an observatory there, Dee Wright observatory. Very interesting looking stone building made with lava stone, resembling a small Dracula castle. Some bats came out after sunset to make it feel even more vampire like.....







There is a marker on top pointing to different Cascade peaks.







The sun started going down and the sky turned pink.









Then the moon slowly crept up from behind a mountain.







It got dark, we get in the car and.....I turn on the radio. Linkin Park and In The End comes on shortly after. Unreal. I pull over, turn up the volume and Chester's voice fills up the night. Coincidence? I don't think so. Then we continued driving into the night.....

Met with a new friend, YEAY I made a new friend (!), today. We were supposed to go to the gym, I come along as her guest, yes I started going to the gym again.....nothing crazy once maybe twice a week but the gym was closed due to some problem. So instead we went to Barnes & Noble and then to Jamba Juice where we each had an Island Pitaya, pink dragonfruit bowl. Good to befriend somebody that is nice, calm, sober, into healthy interests like hiking, likes to talk about different subjects in an intelligent manner. And we both love Ville Valo!
Ville, olet kaunis! ❤



We started talking about the importance of independence and also co dependent people. I happened to open up a random magazine at Barnes & Noble earlier and took a pic of this page that I think holds a lot of wise words. But to each their own you know.....relationships can be amazing as well. If that is what it truly is. Do not get fooled by the happy facade some put up on Fakebook. That doesn't necessary represent the whole truth, sometimes far from it. I love love though, love is beautiful but alone is beautiful as well.



I know of a woman that has been single for a total of about three months since she was a young teen. Sounds healthy - not. She is in her late 30's now but looks more like 55 plus but that is what is awaiting you after a life full of drinking.....anyhow. Reminded me of something that I read somewhere and that resonated with me so I copied it and saved it for the appropriate occasion, which is now.
The Backup Boyfriend explained, "A lot of women don't like the idea of facing life without a man to lean on, so if they think that their current relationship is shaky they start trying to line up potential replacements. This avoids any awkward gaps with no man to bar hop with, to deal with getting the car fixed, to fix the clogged toilet, etc. Once she decides to dump the current man unit all she has to do is snap her fingers and you'll come running. Have some self respect and date a woman who is actually available and wants to be with you. It's amazing to me how often men fall for this."
Throw in a pregnancy (especially at the beginning stages of the relationship) and you are set! He is trapped and forever yours! Good luck. Parenthood is the most important responsibility one can take on.
Getting a man is easy. Men are always willing. Most women could have a roster of men on rotation. Having a quality person to share your life with, truly share your person and space with, now that is a different story.
Now I am going to take a nap outside, I love sleeping outside, feeling the wind brush my skin. It has been so hot, 90s so I have to wait with anything outdoorsy until it cools off a bit. Later park time with Chhaya.

The other night I found myself driving up a winding road through a magical looking forest on a rather narrow road. Up and up until I finally arrived at the summit, it looked barren up there and the sky was thick with an amazing display of stars. I had to pee really bad and stopped right before this sign, stepped outside of the car and peed. I actually really like peeing outside, there is a time and place for everything and I am not just going to squat down and pee on a busy road or anywhere inappropriate but since nobody was around.....why not.
I got back in the car and started driving, right then Depeche Mode's Personal Jesus came on, I turned up the volume and sang along. Perfect timing.... And then I drove down from the summit and decided I need to go back to this place and this forest again. I want to see it again, I want to gaze at the stars from up there. Life is so.....strange sometimes. Is everything already written in the stars, are there no coincidences or do things just happen as they happen? Is there a reason for everything or are there no reasons at all? Those are my thoughts tonight. I went to the gym earlier, Numb by Linkin Park came on and I heard Chester's voice. I felt sad. What is the reason for any tragedy?

30 years since The Lost Boys came out! You know when people ask you about your favorite food, color, book and movie? Well, I have three favorite movies, although I think many movies are good. Here are the three in no particular order, The Lost Boys , The Breakfast Club and Pan's Labyrinth . I freakin' LOVE The Lost Boys as do many others, everything about that movie is so good. Just everything, the cast, the music, the scenery, the story......ahhhhhhhh. I wish they played it at the local movie theatre tonight, I would so go and see it.
"Are you freebasing, Michael? Inquiring minds want to know." and “Death by stereo!”
Sadly Corey Haim passed away a few years ago. I had a huge crush on Corey and I have read what Corey Feldman said about the known pedophilia that is going on in Hollywood and I do not think he is exaggerating. I saved an article about Corey after his passing and here is one page from it, it's from 2010.



Childhood trauma can cause some severe sadness in life and many can't deal with that kind of pain and will turn to drugs and alcohol to self medicate. Look at Chester (Bennington), he was molested as a child and struggled with that and also what seemed like a rather crappy family situation in general and now he is gone too. I still can't believe that Chester is no longer here, it is unreal. Another beautiful person gone. Just WHY? I feel very, very bad for his wife and children. How does she (his wife) deal with this? I can't imagine her heartbreak. Chester seemed like a truly beautiful human being, loved by many. It is so sad that the kind, soft people with sensitive and beautiful souls often feel that life gets too hard to deal with. Those are the people that are needed here in this world. Instead the selfish loudly bellowing brutes amongst us trample on with no care about anyone else besides themselves and what benefits them.
Childhood, the formative years are extremely important, your future self gets shaped. The thoughts, emotions and memories that you have to face when alone as an adult will be there one day, that is why some people can't be alone because they can't deal with themselves and their feelings and many will numb all of that by self medicating or turn to other harmful behaviors.
The director of Pan's Labyrinth (Guillermo del Toro) is coming out with a new movie soon, I will see that on the big screen.

I know I have not checked in for a while but me and Chhaya traveled around last week, we were busy exploring. After all there are many trees to smell and climb and squirrels to chase!





No squirrels get harmed when Chhaya runs after them.....they scurry up the nearest tree and sit at a safe distance and snicker at her. Chhaya gets very excited over this.
And I found an amazing reflexology place! 90 minutes of pure bliss performed by a lady named Jun. She massaged my ears, first she put warm towels on my ears.....then she started kneading and pulling on them and then she put her pinky finger into each ear and started stretching my ear opening. Sounds weird maybe but it felt amazing.....! And she massaged my hands and my feet. OMG I love, love, love getting my feet rubbed. I was very happy. I told her that I will be back.



I got done with a hike this evening and I am in bed, ready to sleep. Feeling tired.