Skinnyfine somebody called me the other night. Never heard that one before. Once in a while I weigh myself at that fancy scale/BMI and heart rate machine they have at Whole Foods.
It said 133 lbs the other day. I like to find out my heart rate too.
But a scale at work indicated a bit less, 132.4 since I'm wearing less while weighing myself.
I can't strip down to a bra and panty at Whole Foods. Trust me, I know how to behave in public. I'm not the girl that whips out her boobs at a significant others company party, gets nekkid around the campfire (unless it's a nekkid kind of hippie gathering of some sort but even then I would probably leave parts covered up) or strips on top of pool tables at bars or parties. I even managed attending Mari Gras without flashing any boob. For what? I do not need that kind of attention. If you do these things, fine. I don't and that's fine too. But do not talk bad about strippers please if you get naked or whip your tits out every chance you get at parties just so you can get some attention from drunk guys.
I like to be on the skinnyfine side personally, it's a better look for me but I do not diet.
My weight fluctuates a few pounds up and down. It's always a good time for a vanilla latte and a pastry. Perfect way to start out the day! Like today, here is breakfast.
And now to the VAPID part. I wasn't even going to say something about this drama but then last minute today I changed my mind and went out and got this In Touch gossip magazine only so I could use it for this entry. See recently a person I traveled with at the end of last year sent me some very nice emails telling me that all that I am is a stripper who's only skill in life is "reading magazines, drinking overpriced coffee, and talking about themselves." That is only a scratch on the surface of all the nasty stuff she managed to come up with. BUT YES OF COURSE! All I am is just that. I love my overpriced daily lattes but so do millions of other people, hence all the Starbucks and other coffee shops that you can find all over.
Somehow they are all in business making profits. Why? Because people love those overpriced caffeinated drinks. She forgot to mention the pastries, I love my daily pastry too! Get it right next time! Indeed, all I ever read are gossip magazines, I have NEVER opened up a book in my life.......ever. Wait, I finished Tolstoy's Anna Karenina when I was around 11 and have been reading books non stop since I learned to read at the age of 6. Millions of other people read books and gossip magazines, nothing to brag about or be ashamed of, although the magazine in the pic I got just for the pic. I will leave it at Madhouse Coffee when I leave.
Now let's address the talking about myself part, I knew that the blog annoyed her because I could sense that in between the lines in a few comments that she left but I chose to ignore it. Yes, people that write blogs tend to talk about themselves. This is MY blog about MY life and things that I do and experience and think about. DUH. Plus some of the stuff I say in the blog should be taken with a grain of salt as I have a sense of humor and like to express that. As far as only talking about myself outside of the blog, actions always speak louder than words and I have done plenty of stuff for others in my life and people I do not even know that I can confidently make the statement that I care about SO MUCH MORE than only myself.
I probably care too much for others and that in turn has brought me a lot of sadness in my life. This person should had been out of my life a long time ago after her ugly side came out a few times but she wanted back in and I forgive anything because that's just how I am.
After this post there is no way back. I might enjoy overpriced lattes and talk about myself in the blog but here is what I don't do. I don't have a nasty gas problem that I constantly let out loudly through my mouth and ass right next to others and think it is HILARIOUS when in fact it's DISGUSTING. Sadly this is a fact about her. What else.....I don't air out my stinky feet at airplanes thinking it's OK. Well, I would never even board an airplane with bare stinky (her own description) feet - YUCK. Why? Because I have consideration for my fellow humans. And I also would never go and work somewhere with another girl, share hotel room, ride back and forth to work and other places in her car, make money and then FLAT OUT REFUSE to pay my part. NO. Why? Because anybody with an ounce of common sense and morals knows that it's wrong. She can keep the money, she obviously needs it way more than I do. She is, or at least was a stripper too (I have no clue what she does today) and had more problems interacting with other dancers and club management than I have ever witnessed. Clubs get in touch with me asking me to come back because they like the way I carry myself. I make friends, exchange numbers and actually hang out with some of my coworkers. That speaks volumes.
To be fair and I always want to be fair, I shared fun moments with this girl. Well, at least I was under the impression that we did, she seems to have been thinking that I was a "fake cunt" (her own words) the whole time but she still chose to be around me and keep in touch.
She has good qualities. But when a person doesn't want to pay me back money for things they rightfully owe for and on top of it comes at me with very nasty insults, not only about myself but other people around me, well then it's enough. I tried to reason with her because I believe in reaching agreements, compromising and salvaging friendships but to no avail.
What I am learning more and more as I walk though life and it's a very PAINFUL lesson, is that there are a very few people that you can trust. There is a thin line between love and hate.
I am a very fragile person and this realization has torn my heart into pieces. I am extremely grateful for my friends and I cherish them. You know who you are.
ADDENDUM. It's been a few hours since I wrote what's above. Afterwards I went to Whole Foods cause I was craving Death Salsa (spicy baby) and the yummiest carrot cake ever. I also went to Barnes & Noble and got Psychology Today and Bark.....NO gossip magazines (!!!) although according to somebody all I do is read those. And while flipping through the pages in random magazines in the store I saw this. And tonight it really resonated with me so I snapped a pic of it with the intention to add it here later.
People that don't even know me talk shit because of what I do. But on the other hand people treat others in ways that I would never even dream of, ever. But I am the one they talk bad about. Or a person that I was nice and generous to happens to owe me money but feels like she shouldn't pay me back writes me long ugly e mails accusing me of all kinds of made up bullshit from her twisted mind and calls me names. Yea yea......you feel bad about yourself, I know this and now you are projecting. This is your loss, not mine. I need to rid myself of people that bring me negativity and sadness. They do not deserve what I offer.
