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The Most Beautiful

Chhaya is the most beautiful.....LOOK at her! ❤ ❤ ❤
I'm like one of those annoying moms that shoves their baby pics in people's faces and forces them to admire their offspring. I can't even describe in words how much I love Chhaya and what she means to me. She is my everything......

Who ate the mushroom?


I am driving through the desert in Nevada.....again, it smells wonderful, it is the sage brush.....aaahhhhh - I LOVE IT!
I stopped at a McDonald's in Fallon to check my e mail and stuff, getting close now! Getting on the road again in a bit.......

In Style

I have arrived in Vegas....I love this place....the air smells like rain and sage brush.....The first stop? Whole Foods for a latte and an almond croissant, stocked up on some food too. I am heading for Burning Man soon and guess what....I am going in style! Not sure about the internet connection at Burning Man therefore my next update might be in a week or so. Well....I have to go....until next time! ♥

On My Way

So.....let's start with a pic of last nights view that I saw while driving to work. SO pretty! That is Mount Redoubt in the background, an active volcano.

We had another sunny and gorgeous day today. Me and Chhaya went walking in Kenai,
I found a new place to take her, it is really nice and close to the beach. Then I had to get ready for my trip. I do not like traveling, I get anxious, everything feels like a chore, the packing.....then the unpacking, the airport, the flight. I also don't like returning to a messy house, so I always try to make sure things look nice before I leave. UGH...... And I hate leaving Chhaya , that is the WORST part. So I am already counting down the days until I can see her and my beautiful home again.......

I hope I didn't forget anything important. I got goggles, a dust mask and my head lamp,
I guess sand storms are common at the Black Rock Desert. My checked bag weighed 49 lbs. There are at least 61 000 tickets sold for this years Burning Man and the limit is 68 000. I will be in that crowd! I feel very happy, excited and a bit nervous..... :-D

I am writing this at the airport. Saw Dan Brown's new book Inferno . Getting that when I get back, it is too thick to bring with me on this trip.


Another sunny and warm day here today. So nice! I actually laid out for a bit but had to retreat inside because I don't want to burn. Drove into town for some errands and grabbed a pizza at St. Elias. I usually eat Margherita, no meat.

I have to show you these pretty potatoes, straight from around here. No pesticides, just pure goodness.

Besides that I have lots to do before tomorrow. I am not stressed....yet. On the other hand I am mentally tired, it has been a month or so of way too much drama for my liking. I like my life calm, quiet and happy. I am not a drama person. Sigh......a BIG sigh.....that is all I can muster for now.


There was a pregnant woman that got assaulted in Sweden recently, she was wearing a hijab, for those of you who do not know, it's a veil that some Muslim women wear. The word hijab in Arabic means a screen or curtain. She was attacked from behind and did therefore not see who her attacker was, there has been discussions and reports in Sweden that she got attacked by a man showing his hate and disapproval of Muslims, basically a hate crime. I have also read a report that it was her own husband that did this to her. What the final outcome will be on who did this to her is at the moment unclear.
However, many women across Sweden decided to wear a hijab for a day (in Sweden now known as hijab upproret) to show solidarity and sisterhood with this woman and many Swedish bloggers wrote in favor of this decisions.
I too want to get involved in this discussion and give my take on it. I am a feminist and would choose NOT to put on a hijab to show my sisterhood with this woman. Why? Because to me the hijab, burqa and chadri (other types of garments Muslim women wear to cover themselves up) stand for oppression and control of women. That is how I look at this.
I suspect that the politically correct thing in Sweden (right now) is to show that you are open minded and put on some sort of a hijab to prove it. No, I am not a Muslim woman and therefore I can't speak on their behalf and how they stand on this issue. I read a few reports on this, there are Muslim women that absolutely agree with the outreach of solidarity of donning the hijab for a day and others that are totally against it and against the practice of covering up. I am not a religious scholar by any means, far from it. I am very well aware of that there are many people out there that get enraged when you discuss or question THEIR religion, even the smallest critique is many times met with death threats and violence.
See Salman Rushdie, Theodoor van Gogh, Ayaan Hirsi Ali, the Danish cartoon controversy, Malala Yousafzai - just to mention a few.
You can look up the names and events I mentioned and read up on them if you are not familiar with them. I was very upset when I found out about Theodoor van Gogh's senseless and brutal murder and it still makes me sad thinking about it.
To me, the veil symbolizes submission. Who is the woman submitting to, God or a man that is telling her how to act and what to wear? That is the question. I have Muslim friends in Sweden that practice Islam and they (they are women) do not veil themselves, so I know it is perfectly possible for a woman practicing Islam to go about her your daily life without wearing a veil of some sorts. Does Islam mean personal freedom for women in some countries where they are not allowed to drive a car, get subjected to female genital mutilation, get married without their own consent, are not allowed to step outside the house without a male chaperone etc. Is that freedom? NOT in my book it is not. Why, if women and men are equal in God's eyes, do some women have to cover up their face, hair and body or otherwise risk getting shunned by society if they don't? Is there something about a woman's appearance that is shameful or dirty? Or is it because some men cannot control their sexual urges around women? That is not equality to me. Yes, a woman should have the freedom to wear whatever she wants, if SHE truly wants to. Not because she has been forced or brain washed from an early age about how she should dress in order to fit in to society. By all means, if you really want to wear a hijab, burqa or chadri without any sort of input from a man, go ahead! I don't care. I myself am wearing capris, a t shirt and some flip flops today.
I decided myself on what to wear, to wear my hair up or down, or whether I am wearing any make up or not. And no, I am not a slave to Western society "rules" about putting on make up when I go out in public, I couldn't care less whether some guy out there finds me attractive or not.
To me sisterhood is about fighting against any religion or injustice that attempts to hold women down. Hundred of years ago in Europe women got burned alive, tortured and drowned because they were accused of being witches. What a scary time that must have been to be a woman! Women gained the equal right to vote in Sweden in 1919, 1920 in the US. Progress people! Some countries are showing very slow or no progress on women's rights, some countries are even going backwards it seems, I can not show any solidarity with that.
I can recommend Ayaan Hirsi Ali's autobiography Infidel . It is a great read and she describes her experiences as a former Muslim woman that managed to escape all of that and is now living in the US. She had female genital mutilation forced onto her as a five year old (torture in my opinion) and was supposed to enter an arranged marriage. She also describes her surprise when she discovered that the women in the Netherlands were walking around without covering themselves up with some form of veil and that women and men managed to co exist perfectly fine. Go figure!


I felt a bit sluggish today, it has been raining a lot here....almost everyday. I felt a slight headache earlier and since I am working tonight I took an Excedrin, I can't function with a headache. Especially not at work.
Last night at work somebody wanted to talk to me about my sexuality. This is a topic I don't talk about. I am never excited (sexually) at work and I do not claim that I am to entice guys to get a dance. That's kind of....ewwwww you know? Once in a while when I am in a funny mood I will talk in a heavy Borat accent about VAGINES and Bilo but besides that I do not have much to say about my sexuality. I am very normal I guess. The way I describe myself is.....I am a vanilla pillow queen. That's how it is.....take it or leave it.
I was actually in a funny mood last night, I was making my best Borat impressions, I also pretended to be Bear Grylls hunting for fish with a spear. Then I spotted a feathery face mask hanging on the wall, so I put that on and jumped on stage in my regular clothes.....rain boots and sweats. I am going to put that mask on another time, ask for dances and see what happens. If I am ever bored I can always amuse myself.
I am reading a new book, Orange Is The New Black by Piper Kerman, it's good. is getting colder here. I had to put on a scarf for the evening walk with Chhaya, two more months and the snow will be here.

But I need to hurry now, it is almost 9 pm, I need to slap on my lashes and go. My fans at work are patiently waiting!

The 3 Women That Visit Strip Clubs

And this will be the third and last (for now at least) entry that I copy from The Domino Effect . Her blog is very informative and interesting. You should check it out, here

These are merely my observations. I don’t mean to “slut shame” anyone or sound discriminating.

1. The Insecure Girlfriend That Wants To Be “Cool”

The dancers know who I’m talking about. This is the girl that comes in with her boyfriend because he wanted to go. She doesn’t want to say no because she doesn’t want to seem controlling. She may also just want to keep an eye on him. They may come with or without his friends. She sits at a table with her arms crossed, looking incredibly nervous. When a dancer speaks to her or tries to get her to loosen up, she blushes and turns away. She isn’t necessarily rude, overtly judgmental, or catty. She either doesn’t speak up when a dancer takes a dollar off of her or lifts her shirt, or she refuses to partake in any shenanigans.

Tatiana's input.....Yes, I have seen her and observed her. Some girls are very uncomfortable in a strip club environment, it can be a lot for virgin eyes to take in. Especially if you go with your boyfriend and feel insecure. I understand. Try to relax, I am not going to hurt you or try to take your boyfriend. I always respect girls that come in (unless they act catty). I am a feminist after all.

2. The Bitchy “Strippers Are Sluts” Girl

She’s always there with a group, usually on a Friday or Saturday night or a drinking holiday. She orders a drink and stands with a group of girls, occasionally turning around to look at the girl on stage and whisper about her, just like junior high. She’s the jealous, insecure type, but she’d never let you know it. She’s very catty, obviously judgmental, and thinks she is better than the dancers. This is the same type of girl that may compete with the dancers by grinding on guys in her group. She’s also prone to drunken dancing like a moron with her girlfriends. These are the girls that also may come with their significant other in order to supervise him.

Tatiana's input.....Oh yes, I have seen this girl many times. She glares and talks shit about us dancers with her girlfriends. They don't like us dancers, we are the sluts that are beneath them. They are the good girls. We get naked, for money. Almost always the group of good girls will get drunk and sloppy, they will get up and gyrate and grind and hump each other or their boyfriends. It usually looks pathetic and us dancers watch and laugh. Look girl, I don't want your man. Relax. Enjoy the show.....women are beautiful creatures. Maybe you can learn some sexy moves from watching me to impress your man with. He would probably like that....he he. Besides, that grinding you just did in public, I would never do. I only do it at work and I get paid to do it. Just sayin'. ;-)

3. The Cool Bi-Curious or Openly Bi Girlfriend (Or Single Girl) There To Have Fun

My favorite type of girl. These are the girls sitting at the stage, tipping, encouraging the dancers, and putting dollars on their friends. They’re fun, they buy dances, and they ask good questions. They are impressed by pole tricks. They love to either get double dances with their significant other or buy dances for him/her. They cheer and clap for the girls. They aren’t judgmental or catty.

Tatiana's input.....Yes I love these girls too. ❤ Girls are welcome to come to strip clubs if they are no drama and act cool.

Annoying Guys That Visit Strip Clubs

Here is another entry that I borrowed from The Domino Effect . You can find her blog here

I know @AngryStripper has written something similar, but someone asked me about the most annoying guys that come into strip clubs, and I thought it was a good choice for a blog post.

The Ed Hardy Wearing Douchebag
This guy is usually the loud, drunken, obnoxious ringleader of lesser douchebags. He flaunts his Ed Hardy or Remetee proudly while reeking of Axe body spray. He demands the attention of the dancers and certainly doesn’t expect to pay for it. After all, isn’t that what the Axe is for?

Tatiana's input.....Sorry to break it to some of you guys but it is time to retire the Ed Hardy attire. If you just have to wear it, do so while mowing the lawn or changing the oil in your car. I actually like the way Axe smells. I'd rather get a whiff of Axe body spray than a stinky armpit.

The Suit
This guy plans out his trip to the strip club weeks in advance, plotting his every line. They think they’ll trick girls into thinking they have money by wearing a suit. Guys, we know you didn’t come from work at 11PM on a Saturday night in a college town. Also, we know the credit limit on the Capital One card in your wallet is $300.

Tatiana's input.....HA HA HA, YES! :-D

The Middle-Aged Condescending Golfer
He comes in with a small group of other golfers. You can spot him by his red polo shirt. He’s quick to act possessive and stalkerish. He talks loudly, and usually throws out references to current events that he doesn’t think the dancer will understand. She is, after all, a stupid stripper. Right?

Tatiana's input.....Ugh....I can't stand when people assume that I am stupid and I love it when I do put them back in their place by showing off my worldly skills and sophistication. The days of the "dumb stripper" are long gone. Sure, some girls are dumb but I have met my fair share of dumb guys too. Not everybody can be the sharpest tool in the shed you know.

The Pimp (or wannabe pimp)
This guy’s a gem. He wears baggy clothes, a baseball cap with stickers intact, and sometimes, bling necklaces and Air Jordans or something equivalent. He will try to convince you that you would make much more money just by being his girlfriend. This guy will fuck you sideways with beautiful lines, ladies.

Tatiana's input.....First of all, I do not like pimps and what they stand for whatsoever. I remember a few encounters I had with them while working at Crazy Horse Too in Vegas.
They, unsuccessfully of course, tried to lure me in with promises of Rolexes. I don't even wear a watch. The only Rolex I would be interested in is a quality MDMA pill called Rolex.

The Salesman
This guy is usually an upper middle class dude. He winces when you sit with him and says “Yeah, yeah, I know how it works, I’m in sales” and insists that you give him your best sales pitch. Of course, he probably won’t buy, but it may help if you insult him a bit. You have to be masochistic to be in sales.

The Pro Athlete
This guy is a celebrity, and he demands to be treated as such. In other words, he expects every woman in the club to fawn all over him. And dammit, he wants that attention for free! Chances are, he won’t buy a dance or tip you, but he’ll try to get you drunk so he can bring you back to his hotel room to rape you. Maybe that’s harsh; he might offer to pay for the sex.

Tatiana's input....Yes, some celebs assume that we will entertain them for free. I remember a certain rapper and his entourage being asked to leave the VIP room at Crazy Horse Too in Vegas after not wanting to pay the girls for lap dances. I caught on to this right away, I sat and chatted briefly with him and then I excused myself and moved on, he was not that cute or special. I mean, even Sting paid me to dance for him at Flashdancers NYC.

The Indian Guys
These guys usually come in pairs. Fresh from India, they sit at the stage and don’t tip. They try to touch you, and on the off chance that they do buy a dance, chances are they’ll pull out their cock and expect a blow job. Just remember that strip clubs in India are basically brothels.

Tatiana's input....True. Note the fresh from India, not Americanized Indian guys, they understand the whole strip club things and most of them are polite and delightful. But I know many girls that would not bother with the fresh from India guys for all the above reasons.

Dressing Room Etiquette

Once in a while I come across another dancer's blog. Newsflash.......I am not the only dancer that writes you know! ;-) A notable one would be Diablo Cody, a former dancer that wrote the book Candy Girl: A Year in the Life of an Unlikely Stripper and the award winning movie, Juno . So this girl dominoxxx is a cam girl and a dancer. Her blog, The Domino Effect is full of good stuff and I found some entries so on point and/or interesting that I am going to copy a few to my blog so you can enjoy them too. BUT note this, I did not write them, dominoxxx did, she gets the credit. What I will do is add my own input to it where I feel the need. So here is the first out of a few that I will share here. About dressing room etiquette.....

1. Keep to Yourself

If you don’t know the club staff or the other dancers, keep to yourself. Don’t be rude, but don’t inject yourself into others’ conversations. Only speak when spoken to, especially in the dressing room.

Tatiana's input......I have been the new girl to clubs a few times when I travel. Some girls are clicky and not welcoming to new girls (after all you are a rival in many ways, especially if you happen to look good too) and some are very welcoming. People tend to feel each other out a bit in the beginning, that's normal. Just like with any job place I guess. But yes, I think keeping to yourself and being polite the first couple of nights is a good rule to follow.

2. Borrowing Things

If you forgot something you need, live without it for the night. Make a note of what you need and put it in your bag when you get home. If it’s something you can’t live without, like a tampon, ask the housemom (if there is one) or ask another dancer, but ALWAYS OFFER TO TIP HER. Frame it like this: “Can I give you a bucks for a tampon?”. Yeah, a buck is expensive for a tampon.. but living in peace with your coworkers is priceless. The same rule applies for borrowing a flat iron, baby wipes, phone charger, body spray, makeup, etc.

3. ALWAYS Ask Before Using Another Dancer’s Stuff

In addition to offering money to use someone else’s stuff, always, always, always ask before you touch someone else’s things.

Tatiana's input.....I agree. If I don't know the girl then I would never just grab somebody's stuff (make up, hair spray, perfume etc.) and use it, that would be rude. Besides, I don't like using other people's make up and perfume, I have my own but you never know when you might need something. Yes, always ask. I would not be happy if some girl I don't know would rummage through my make up bag and use my lip gloss. Yuck!

4. NEVER Touch A Dancer’s Money

The one exception is if she dropped it and you are picking it up to help her. If you’re splitting tips from a shower show and you’re both counting it, that’s different, too. But if a dancer leaves her money unattended on the dressing room table, do not touch it.

Tatiana's input.....Yes, do NOT touch another dancer's money. Especially if you do not know the girl. If I know you and trust you, I don't mind if you move my money to the side. But I usually keep very good track of my money and my stuff at work. Organized.

5. Don’t Leave Your Money & Valuables Unattended

People steal. It reflects poorly on you if you’re willing to leave something valuable unattended. The same rule applies to phones and expensive perfume or makeup. If it’s worth money, lock it up.

6. Don’t Ask How Much Other Dancers Are Making

Just don’t do it – it’s rude in normal life, and it’s rude in the dressing room. If other girls are openly talking about how much they earn, feel free to listen, but remember that a lot of dancers tend to exaggerate their earnings. I advise against talking about how much you’ve earned. Jealousy sometimes leads to sabotage. Also, don’t complain about how much you haven’t made. Get your ass out of the dressing room, because you’re not going to make any money bitching about not making money.

Tatiana's input.....I will talk to the girls I know about money. We do this, if it is bad we will complain to each other. But I am very well aware that girls constantly exaggerate how much they make to......I guess make themselves feel better about themselves? They bank every night when in reality they made about $ 240. LOL. It's called stripper chatter another girl told me once. Dancer's that just talk but nothing they say makes any sense. Some people are like that. If I have a bad night I have a bad night, it is what it is.

7. Keep Your Compliments Genuine

If you truly like a girl’s nails or hair, tell her so. Keep the fakeness to a minimum.

Tatiana's input....I absolutely agree. I am allergic to fakeness and can't stand fake compliments. I can usually tell when girls are genuine or fake. They change their tone of voice when they are fake. I never give fake compliments, what's the point? I don't need to make friends that bad, besides who wants a fake friend anyways?
One more thing I want to add here is that it really irks me when girls feel the need to whispers to each other when others girls are present. That is such Kindergarten behavior, you should had outgrown that stage already. If you share a secret that nobody else can know, go to a private area or wait until nobody is around. It makes others feel weird when people whisper around them.

8. If Someone Asks To Borrow Something

If someone asks to borrow something inconsequential, like a bobby pin, sure, give it to them. There are usually a few dancers that are chronically unprepared and will try to leech. Whether it’s a cigarette, hairspray, phone charger, whatever.. this gets old fast. Some dancers keep things with them that they sell to other dancers at a premium. This can come in handy on slow nights.

9. Stay In Your Area

Don’t spread your dance stuff all over the dressing table. Don’t leave your stuff where stiletto-clad dancers can trip. Clean up after yourself.

Tatiana's input.....Messy girls are annoying. We all share space, often not a very large space. Some girls spread their stuff all over with no concern for others. Very selfish. Always throw away your trash, your Mom is not present, be an adult and clean up after yourself. Also I do not like when people smoke around me (if smoking is allowed in the club) in the dressing room. It is gross trying to touch up your make up or freshen up while somebody is smoking nearby. Go smoke inside the club. And flush the toilet after you and wipe up the pee drip off the toilet seat.

10. If The Housemom Brings Food

And you eat it, tip her. She buys that food with her own money, the club doesn’t give her a stipend. If you eat the housemom’s food, tip her. Otherwise, you’re a leech and it’s a dick move.

11. Don’t Talk Shit To/About Other Dancers

Even if you hate them. No matter how much they try to fight with you, don’t engage. Walk away. Especially if there’s drunkenness involved. Also, don’t talk shit about dancers to customers. It looks desperate and trashy. And don’t think customers don’t tell other dancers – they do. Sometimes they even start it to get their rocks off.

Tatiana's input.....Have I ever trash talked girls I work with to other girls? Yes, I have. Of course. But I keep the trash talking in between me and the girls I consider to be my friends. If I don't know you I am not going to strike up a conversation with you and bad mouth other girls.
I'd rather not talk at all then. Yes, certain girls I don't like, it is more their BEHAVIOR at work I don't agree with. As far as talking bad about dancer's to random guys that come in. That is not ok. IF I consider the guy a friend (there are a few that fall into that category) they might hear some of my opinions about other girls now and then. Also, if I have something bad to say about a girl I will not be fake and pretend to be her friend either. I will be polite enough but indifferent.

12. Don’t Take Photos Unless You Have Permission

If you’re taking selfies in the dressing room and you’re planning on sending them to someone or putting them on a social networking site, make sure you have the express permission from every person in the photo. Not everyone is “out” about their dancing.

13. If You Ruin Something, Replace It

If you spill a girl’s drink, ruin a g-string, or somehow damage her flat iron or something, replace it. It’s the polite thing to do.

14. Don’t Touch A Dancer Without Her Permission

This goes for guys and girls alike.

15. Trust No One

Check out dominoxxx's blog here