So Tired

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So Tired

I've made what I set out to do, I worked five nights in a row. I am SO TIRED though. For almost two weeks now I've had a cold, just a runny nose and a cough, no fever. Where does all this never ending mucous come from? The cold made me weak so that added to the feeling of being tired. I feel like I've aged five years in this past week. I literally had to force myself to get up and take a shower and get ready for work two of the nights when I fell asleep around 6 pm (just a little nap before work). When you don't have a schedule it is so easy just to stay at home. But I went in. Because I made a promise to myself.
Work.....work was OK. I've said it before but it is exhausting, for me at least, to work in Vegas. The hustle is so aggressive and I'm not like that. Either you want a dance or you don't. I will never beg or try to convince somebody to spend money, rip people off or do something that I feel is compromising to myself. Friday night was awful, people were rude. One guy grabbed my hand and tried to yank me in towards him, I told him to let go of me. My hand and wrist hurt for a while afterwards. Another idiot asked me something obscene. I understand that people misunderstand strip clubs for sex clubs at times, some people don't know any better and some of the dancers definitely add fuel to that misconception, unfortunately. But just the way he asked was just GROSS. Of course I told him exactly what I thought about him and asked him if he had a wife or a girlfriend (I don't look for wedding rings, plus a ring doesn't mean anything.....it's just a ring). And in case you wonder.....I have NEVER had any kind of sex for money. That includes oral sex and hand jobs. That is sex to me. I do not want to see any penises unless it's MY choice. I have zero interest and desire to do certain things for money, sex is one of them. And I am saying this because sometimes people confuse strip clubs for brothels of some sort. NO. That would be illegal in the US.
After the awful Friday I did not want to work for a while, I was close to tears at one point Friday night but I went in anyways last night and it was a completely different experience.
I interacted with so many nice and fun people, it was easy and I laughed a lot, had a good time with some of the girls I work with and just nice people that I met......so you never know how the night will turn out, since every night at work is different.
Me at work early this morning. When I'm not feeling well my eyes look tired, you can see that here.



Tired dancer limbs.



Leaving work, so happy to go home!



I had a photo shoot today with a woman photographer......so cool to shoot with a woman. She was super nice and I really hope we got some good shots. She gave me a ton of compliments and we talked about all kinds of stuff.....I've had a really nice time this afternoon with her! We shot at Red Rock. I have never seen as many people there as I did today, it was crowded. Here I am waiting for her outside Dunkin' Donuts up on West Charleston.



I was kind of frozen when we were done. It's been chilly in Vegas lately (closer to sundown).



Some days I get a very strong feelings of happiness, being grateful for everything in my life and feeling ALIVE. I had one of those days today. Goodnight from Red Rock



And right before I was going to write this entry I came across this. I liked it so here it is.....



I of course don't care much about what people in general think about me. You can think what you want. I have came across enough individuals in my lifetime that were not dancers (strippers) that have done stuff and acted in nasty and trashy ways that I would never dream of doing.....those people are everywhere. And I have also came across certain dancers that were no good people. Some people have good hearts and light souls, others don't. I know myself and that's all that matters to me.

  • Comments: 3
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  1. Annette on :

    Again...I wish we lived in the same city ;-) if anyone reads your blog they could see your heart!
    My allergies are baaad....I don't think it's a cold. Have you moved to Nevada?
  2. TATIANA Post author on :


    I wish we lived in the same city too!
    Bad allergies no fun.....but allergies this time of year?
    Have I moved to Nevada? I'm not sure.
    ;-)
  3. Annette on :

    In Kansas the ragweed is still growing it won't stop till it freezes which may take awhile. So when the wind blows which it does a lot here my allergies bother me. This is not Minnesota ;-) it's snowed already back in MN. I went and visited MPLS for Halloween 🙂 and had!

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