Skip to content


So I spent some time last week watching a few documentaries on Netflix. Let me see if I can focus enough so I can put down my own reflections in words.
I watched Fed Up about many people's eating habits here in the US. Quite interesting. I felt genuinely bad for a larger size teenage boy living at home, desperately wanting to lose weight and improve his health. I can totally see how difficult it must be to try to be healthy and lose weight when both your parents are overweight and make really poor choices when stacking up on groceries that basically consist of processed food only. I guess he can try to change his lifestyle the day he moves out of his parent's house. If you want to lose weight, look into how Penn Jillette did it. I know that I am addicted to sugar, I have a huge sweet tooth. Ever since I was little I liked desserts and I feel like a dinner is not complete without a something sweet to top it off. I would probably turn into a monster if I would attempt to go on a sugar detox. But I also love eating "good" stuff - fruits and vegetables, not to mention that I don't eat meat.
And I am not scared of exercise. Of course all of that doesn't guarantee that I will live a long and disease free quality life. I know of skinny and relatively fit people that supposedly lived a healthy lifestyle that got cancer or other health problems and others that smoke and drink and putter along just fine but at least for NOW I feel good. I do think that it is a parents duty and responsibility to be a good parent and that means make an effort to feed their child/children nutritious food, not only fast food and stuff that comes out of a package full of hormones and preservatives just because it's supposedly cheaper and more convenient.
I don't know if you drink diet soda or drink other beverages full of that fake sugar poison (aspartame for example) BUT if you do, I urge you to stop and get the facts. Letting your kids drink diet soda should be a crime. I've been knowing about the fake sugars and diet sodas for a while, I thought that everybody knew about how bad that is for you.....but no. I would rather drink 5 regular sodas per day instead of one can of diet soda if I had to choose.

Then I watched Girl Model . About the big business of finding young girls in Russia to get sent off to model in Japan. A place where they love the YOUNG and innocent looking, the younger the better! The film crew followed 13 year old Nadya from some village in Novosibirsk.
This poor baby got shipped to Tokyo, not knowing English let alone Japanese with the promise (per her contract) that she was going to get at least two modeling jobs that would pay a total of $8000. She finally landed one job that she wasn't even clear on if she got paid for or not and ended up leaving Japan with a $2000 debt. How is this even possible? Her roommate, another Russian girl was promised the same income and left Japan with a $2500 debt. The contract stipulated that it could be revoked at any time if the girls gained any weight or ONE centimeter in bust, waist or hips. The girls hated being in Tokyo so much that they wished for weight gain just so they could be sent back home. It is SICK to use underage girls like this and send them far away from their parents to be among strangers that can take advantage of them any way they want. Nadya was a truly beautiful and pure girl, a typical teenager from Russia, growing up with her parents and a loving babcia (granny). I felt so bad for her, a heavy burden weighing on her to go and make money as a model to finance for her parent's house back home. How many of these girls go missing each year? Disappear into sex trafficking to never be seen again? Prostitution was casually mentioned in the documentary.
Nadya returned to to her family only to go back to Japan a while later, I bet to have to pay off her "debt" to the agency. That should be criminal, child labor leading to a huge debt.
Another very disturbing aspect of the documentary was Ashley, some woman working as the scout on behalf on the modeling agency. Herself being a former teen model in Japan that remembered hating her time as a model. Ashley seemed seriously disturbed, I would never want her around my kids if I had any. I think that Ashley hates life in general and should go somewhere quiet where she can sort through her obvious issues. Modeling seems so glamorous, I know I was fascinated by it as a teen and still admire pics that I see in fashion magazines. But there is a whole side to modeling that the public often is not aware of.
We only get to see the tip of the iceberg. Far from every model gets discovered as a young teen, a Kate or Gisele success story and proceeds to carve out a very lucrative career for themselves. What happens to the thousands of Nadyas out there? It is interesting to find out that Nadya claims to have not seen this documentary, she is no longer 13 and still models. She feels that she did not get portrayed correctly and is upset. I don't understand how else she could had gotten portrayed? She seems sad, scared and confused throughout the documentary except when she is back home in the village. She clearly states that she wants to go home when in Tokyo, she cries. She leaves with a significant debt. I suspect she feels she has no other choice than to pretend to be offended by the way she was portrayed to secure a continued income from the modeling. How else is she going to make money?
She has been doing this since she was 13. And who would not watch a documentary about themselves anyways? I find that hard to believe.

I also watched something called Kink . Quite an interesting timing because the other night I was at a friend's house and she had rented 50 Shades of Grey that I reluctantly agreed watch. For all the women out there idolizing Christian Grey and his dominant sessions with Anastasia, watch Kink and see what "real" BDSM is about. First of all, let's get one thing straight - the Christian Grey character is a dude with some serious issues OK and Anastasia is just a delusional girl thinking that she will be THE ONE to change him. This is normal, women and girls think that they can change troubled boys and men all the time. Never say never but I think it's safe to say that most of the time that bad boy will not change, no matter how good you are to him or how hard you try. People change when and IF they want to. And sometimes they end up in prison and are forced to conform. And yes, I speak from experience in regards to the trying to change a guy. I think it's sad that 50 Shades of Grey is a movie that might lure young impressionable girls to believe that the relationship portrayed between Anastasia and Christian is something to strive for, that it is romantic and love of some sort. Now back to Kink . It was interesting to watch but a bit boring sometimes. After a while all of that BDSM bores me. I understand that some people like to be dominated and others get off on pain and whatever. I personally don't get why anybody would willingly hang upside down, tied up and gagged with a large machine in between their legs, a machine that makes loud and scary sounds while it works away at somebody's private parts and enjoy that?
I personally would had been terrified. But that's just me. For anybody that might be wondering, I am probably as VANILLA as it gets. Yes, I am a proud vanilla pillow princess. I am not going to bend over backwards to indulge in somebody's anal or deep throat abuse fantasies. Sorry (actually I'm not sorry). I'm not the girl for you then. How about you stick a size large dildo up YOUR ass and show me what a good boy YOU are and gag on an aubergine while looking up at me with large "I'm just a dirty little man slut " eyes until you almost throw up? Huh?! If others want to get tied up, whipped/flogged, get large objects inserted into them, their nipples tortured, spat on, beaten up all in the name of love, pleasure and exciting sex.....GOOD for them, IF it is consensual I should add. I really wondered about how consensual some of the stuff really was in the Kink documentary. I'm sure some of the people endured it only so they could make a buck to be able to pay rent, put food on the table and whatnot. Even if the issue of not faking it was brought up frequently. People fake sex on camera all the time, it's called PORN. But if being "kinky" is what you are into then well, enjoy. Different strokes for different folks.

Now to the last documentary and the one that upset me the most. Tricked . It followed some young girls and their stories about how they ended up being sold for sex. And the pimps facilitating it. First of all I hate pimps and I do not understand how an adult woman would allow a man to treat her like that. But in Tricked you get to see and hear from children getting sold. First you get to see a girl that started prostituting at 17. She said she wanted love and confused the attention she got from selling her body as love. I have seen this a lot.
Young girls, even older but still confused girls and young women wanting attention from guys so badly, that any attention makes them feel validated and seen so they do whatever for that attention.
This happens in different shapes and forms all over the place. Throughout the documentary pimps make the most lamest statements about women. One smug idiot says that ALL women are either whores or prostitutes. ALL women in his twisted mind. Yes, he is talking about YOUR mother and YOUR sister, if you have any of those. Really. I would like to see him in a national debate with Michelle Obama on this topic. Every pimp in this documentary was black, or should I say African American? I don't even know what to call people of African descent in this country anymore, I mean if you say the wrong thing you might incite a riot with destroyed buildings and businesses and the wrath of an indignant Al Sharpton. Whatever you say or write, somebody will get offended and maybe angry. Jeez. Anyhow, every single pimp featured was black except for one scrawny white, or should I say Caucasian (?) dude at the very end. How come so many pimps are black when they make up a smaller percentage of the US population? Just an observation that I'm sure more people than me have reflected over. And please do not sit there and blame that you came from bad circumstances, not privileged and yadda yadda yadda, OK? That excuse is beyond tired and needed to get retired last year. This is America, fuck you can even become the President if you work hard enough. Shoot for the stars baby! One girl was sold on the street when she was eleven. Yes, eleven. There are men out there that willingly pay to have sex with a MINOR. Her pimp took her virginity and then made a nice chunk of money of her cause her young tight body sometimes put $1500 in his pocket daily. I don't even know what to say anymore regarding this.
Thinking about it just makes me feel a dark hole in my heart and sadness. Like how do you even start to deal with this problem? What do you do? I SO admire the people that are out there fighting to control these problems, trying to prosecute pimps and put them in jail and get young girls off the streets. I think that every guy that gets busted for buying an underage girl for sex should have his picture blasted on the front page of the local newspaper.
Maybe that would work as a deterrent for some of them. How do you NOT care or see that some of these girls are OBVIOUSLY too young to be selling themselves for sex? Looking for sex on Craigslist or Backpage and then proceed to buy sex in some motel room screams WRONG and risk for disease in so many ways. I am also surprised over how cheap it is to buy sex. Cheaper than buying groceries. I spend more money on my latte and groceries daily than the cost of sex. How is this possible?
Now some people might say that I am a prostitute because I am a dancer aka stripper.
To some it might be the same thing. To me it is not. Being almost nude or nude in public place (strip club) and having somebody's penis inside of you are two completely different things to me. But there will always be people that insist it is the same thing, all kinds of people from women feminists to angry significant others. When in fact I (and I know other dancers too) can count the penises I've had intimate contact with in the last decade or so on one hand and get a few fingers left over. So much for a prostitute for you. Now how do I feel about LEGAL prostitution? I am conflicted and undecided. Because I can't decide if it truly IS a victimless crime across the board or not. Of course some women are in total control of their affairs as prostitutes and that I can only applaud. Because that is exactly the way it should be. I want to emphasize that there is just AS MUCH "stigma" to pay for a prostitute as there is to be one. Do not think for a second that you are any better than a prostitute if you pay women to have sex with you (in case you look down on prostitutes that is). If anything, you are the needy and pathetic one. And if you happen to buy sex from underage children and/or trafficked women, then you should get prosecuted. So it's probably better and safer for everybody in general to stay clear of questionable cheap sex in seedy motel rooms. Now, do things happen in strip clubs that should NOT happen in strip clubs? Sadly, yes. I have worked in clubs where the rules are STRICTLY enforced and I think that is great. Then I have also worked in clubs where all kinds of shady stuff are happening and management chooses to turn a blind eye because they are driven by money only. This I do not like. I have spoken up but learned that it's usually fruitless to do so, it leads to empty promises of change or even firing. That does not mean that I engage in those activities. I'd rather make ZERO dollars feeling happy, clean and sane than whatever amount if that means doing something I am not OK with. I am always the boss at work. Always. No exceptions. In the strip club I am the domme when it comes to me and my body. I can turn from a smiling angel to somebody you do not want to mess with within seconds if you cross me.
Now here are some stills from Tricked . Ponder for a while how you would feel if that was you, forced into prostitution as an eleven year old. Or if that was your own child......

Another documentary that recently got out on Netflix is called Hot Girls Wanted , it's next on my to watch list. Girls think that they can become the next Jenna Jameson or Kim K by doing porn. Young girls. You know barely 18, a hot commodity in the porn industry. Well, Jenna was successful and now I don't even think that she has custody of her children anymore and seems to be a mess. Kim K got lucky, she had connections already and yes, she did have sex on camera but with her boyfriend at the time, not some random dudes that DP'd her OK. Huge difference. These girls searching for fame through porn are delusional. No, chances are very slim that you will blow up to Kim K fame after you "star" in some porn movies. But never say never I guess.


No Trackbacks


Display comments as Linear | Threaded

Mumintrollet on :

"had rented 50 Shades of Grey that I reluctantly agreed watch."

I'll read it now.

Explain why it's so popular among women?

Tatiana on :

I personally do not know why it is so popular. I looked through the first book in a bookstore a few years ago and thought it was really bad. So no I don't get it. At all. There was nothing in that storyline that was appealing to me.

Mumintrollet on :

So now I've read it.

It's childish in tone, when considering that the readers are mainly 30-40 year old women . ( Or am I wrong? )

But the ending with the last chapter is actually "empowering" for women/girls ( I dont know how the movie interpreted the book) , because she ends the abusive relationship .
The message is "He can be rich , good looking, expert on sex
and have a big dick , but you should still take no shit from a guy".

Tatiana on :

I agree on the childish tone, I thought it was very simple. Too much so. this message you quote is that at the end of the first book or actually at the end of the third and last book? Since 50 Shades is a trilogy.
I only looked through the first book and did not like it at all.

Mumintrollet on :

The quote is my interpretation of the last chapter in the first book 50 shades of Grey ( I will not read the trilogys other two... ) .

Even though she's inexperienced she abandons the guy who will give her almost everything because she will not compromise on what she think is central for her.

Tatiana on :

She (Anastassia) obviously missed the abuse/relationship cause she goes back for more....there are two more books after the first which I will not touch.
Domme = professional female dominant.

Paul on :

Great write up - thanks. I will recommend Girl Model to my 13 yr old daughter. Netflix & YouTube have a ton of good docs & foreign pics worth seeing. One of the best docs I saw recently is called Art of Killing - disturbing, but very good.

Tatiana on :

Yes Girl Model is great. Even for adults to watch.
Art of Killing? OK.....I'm watching it.

Mumintrollet on :

"I am the domme"

I had to google that.

Mumintrollet on :

In 50 shades it was just "Dom" .

Add Comment

E-Mail addresses will not be displayed and will only be used for E-Mail notifications.
Enclosing asterisks marks text as bold (*word*), underscore are made via _word_.
Standard emoticons like :-) and ;-) are converted to images.
Form options

Submitted comments will be subject to moderation before being displayed.