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I Love You

I had a scary day but it was worse for Chhaya. She is so strong, so AMAZING. If I was like Chhaya I would be just as amazing. But I'm human not a dog. My baby had FOUR seizures in the span of about six hours. The first one at 6 am, we laid together in bed, I adjusted her a bit and cuddled her, she got up.....looked at me, her mouth got contorted into a snarl and she fell over and started convulsing. The fourth seizure in front of the vet on the floor in his office. She bit her tongue and her breathing was labored. I thought I was going to die. A piece of my heart broke and my heart is barely hanging on as is......I'm just here for Chhaya now. Nothing else.
After a few hours getting observed at the vet, getting a shot of valium, IV fluids and phenobarbital (anti seizure medication) that she will be on for a while now I got to take her home with the help and emotional support from Drinda and Deborah (Thank You).
Chhaya is resting now, she had dinner and went potty. So good. So amazing.
I have cried so much I don't know how I can have tears left.
My brave Chhaya, my girl I love you so much. You make me happy. You are so beautiful. You are my friend. My baby. You are so smart, funny, playful and gentle.
I have prayed that we will always be connected even after we get separated one day.
I think the seizures were triggered by heat, even the first one she had back in June now when I look back. It was a hot day then and yesterday was very hot also and I think Chhaya got too hot. Please make sure your animal friends don't get too hot.
It can happen even when it's not obvious. Now I will be very careful.
I love you Chhaya, more than any words can describe. My heart knows and I know you know this too.
Jag ar så rädd, så ensam, så vilse. Jag vet inte vad som händer. När kommer det att bli bättre? Jag har väntat så länge. Jag saknar min familj och mina vänner. Jag vill inte finnas längre ibland for det gör så ont. Jag försöker vara stark. Hjälp.

More Politics

I have some more politics to present you with. YEAY......aren't you thrilled?! :-D
I have wondered for a while what would happen when if Trump becomes the President of the USA and he would have to meet up with Putin. would that meeting go? A power clash? Or would they quietly enjoy afternoon tea followed by some vodka? Everybody knows that Putin rules with an iron fist, he is a bad ass that does not take any bullshit from anyone. He has been declared the world's most powerful man more than once by various publications, a title I am sure he is very pleased with.
Well, interesting developments are coming from Putin's side regarding this upcoming US election. I guess there is a mutual admiration on both ends between Putin and Trump. Putin thinks that Trump is, "[Donald Trump is] a really brilliant and talented person, without any doubt,” [Vladimir] Putin told reporters, according to a translation by Interfax. “It’s not our job to judge his qualities, that’s a job for American voters, but he’s the absolute leader in the presidential race.”
And Trump thinks that Putin is somebody that he would "get along very well with" and that "he's running his country and at least he's a leader, unlike what we have in this country." There is even talk about a budding bromance between the two. Should Melania feel nervous? I find this VERY interesting. What is happening?
I can say this much, Putin is very much against the Islamic State in all its forms.
One of the most pressing problems the world is facing, in my opinion. There has been several terrorist attacks in Europe lately (Germany and France). I would like to see how Putin would handle the situation would there be a terrorist attack in the name of Allah in Russia. I think Putin might respond with a few nuclear bombs that would wipe out pretty much all the stronghold areas known for Islamic State and all their affiliates. And I kind of think it might be necessary to do this if these crazed fundamentalists don't stop attempting to push Islam on the rest of us non Muslims. Small history lesson.....back in 1683, The Battle of Vienna. Polish King John III Sobieski fought and conquered the Turks and many believe that stopped a possible Islamification of Europe. Good job Sobieski!
I have no interest in being "politically correct". I am very grateful that I am not forced to oblige to some religion, especially a religion that opresses women. Practice your religion quietly and in peace. Whatever religion you believe in.
Your belief in God is between you and God. And no, I do not think that Islam is a peaceful religion. Obviously not, there is almost daily evidence of that.


Election year is upon us. Whether it will be Clinton or Trump moving into 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue remains to be seen. I am not voting and could I had voted I would had voted for myself. Of course. Chhaya would had been First Dog, a position she would had carried with much success.
I do have some thoughts on Melania's speech since it got so much attention. I did not hear the speech neither have I read it, from what I understand some say that her speech had many similarities to Michelle Obama's speech back in 2008. Perhaps.
What I do think though is that any person running for President of the United States or any commander in chief post in any country should write their OWN speeches. If you want to represent a country as an elected official you should be able to express yourself intelligently verbally and in writing. Your education and intelligence should be vast. Now Melania as a runner up for First Lady of the USA should be well rounded enough to be able to throw together a speech. I don't really see the difficulty here. Nobody is asking her to solve complex math problems
(I know I would not be able to), just deliver an honest speech from her heart. She is nor running for President, so there is less burden on her to deliver something to the same capacity as her husband. And from my understanding somebody is writing his speeches too? I think that is weak and fake. When you are playing on that political level you should be able to take care of your own speeches. The world is watching. So now that they don't even write their own speeches I suggest they at least make it fun. Get Andrew Dice Clay write something or any of the writers from Saturday Night Live, you know to liven things up a bit and make it memorable.
I wonder if Putin writes his own speeches?

Bacha Bazi

The world is beautiful but us humans make it a bad place in countless of ways.
I came across the term "bacha bazi" the other day and remembered the first time I heard about the dancing boys. It was when I read The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini. A truly beautiful work of art. I think that a good writer is an artist since you can capture your audience (the readers) with your words just as much as a musician does with their music or a painter with a painting. Khaled Hosseini is a literary genius, I have read all three of his novels. They are beautiful and heart breaking. And heart breaking is what bacha bazi is.
I want to pound my head into a wall when I learn about the pain humans inflict on others, including animals. If I had to torture another being I would volunteer to kill myself first because I could never live with myself.
The US gives Afghanistan monetary aid. The corruption is rampant in the country. Some are saying nothing has changed in decades, if anything things got worse. Where is the money going? Why give millions and millions to countries that blatantly ignore the Universal Declaration of Human Rights? The children and the poor do not get any of the money? Are they getting food? Clothes and shelter? What is life like for women there? I can answer that.....NOT good. American soldiers are told to look the other way when witnessing children being raped in Afghanistan since the practice of dancing boys or bacha bazi have been around in this area for a very very long time, supposedly centuries since ancient times. But it doesn't make it right. A lot is not right. These children grow up and what happens to children that live through abuse like this.....what kind of adults do they become? Children that go through trauma, either by being subjected to it or witnessing bad stuff bear it with them as adults. It can create some serious behavioral problems, I have seen this myself in adults that had shitty childhoods. I would think most humans can FEEL what is right in their heart and soul, I can, so I think others can too. But I guess some can't.
You want to learn about something this weekend? Read about bacha bazi. Or read one of Khaled Hosseinis novels if you haven't already, I highly recommend the first two. The Kite Runner also got made into a movie.

Image borrowed from Rinnyy Tumblr.

Divide et Impera

Divide et Impera.....Latin for divide and conquer. I studied Latin for a year and it was TORTURE. Me and my friend Ninna spent the Latin lesson by giggling non stop like the two immature teenage girls that we were. We were probably the Latin teachers least favorite students and we had Latin lessons every day, for two semesters. I bet the teacher, it was a she, did not look forward to having to deal with us. This makes me think back.....I miss my friends in Sweden SO much.
So many years have went by and I'm still friends with all of them. It's beautiful. ❤
Anyhow.....divide and conquer. Is that what is going on in the world now? Here in America with the growing racial tensions and shootings of police officers, the BLM issue/movement (and I am not referring to Bureau of Land Management now) and globally the non stop acts of terrorists. Divide and conquer the people, us citizens and then apply a One World Government? Is this the directions were are moving towards? I have skimmed through Agenda 2030 laid out by the United Nations and I like what the message is about but I have to study it more in depth. Because some claim it's an agenda for the New World Order......The goal is to transform our world for the better by 2030.
I think about MY own part in making the world a better place. Everybody has a part, well every adult. We are all pieces of a puzzle that forms a large canvas. Or drops in the ocean and together we are the ocean. The puzzle I have seen several times when in an enhanced state (by drugs/substances), so I think there is something to that. A truth. THE truth?
I sat in a coffee shop last week. Two cops came in. I talked to one of them. A nice and pleasant conversation. I can't imagine how it must feel to be out there knowing that there are people that "hate" you and want to hurt you, even kill you when you are doing your job.
I also got pulled over late at night last week. I swerve when I drive, not much but I do. That gets the attention of police, especially late at night because they think they might have a potential drunk driver on the loose. Well, the officer was super nice to me. I always smile and I am always polite. I have gotten out of speeding, not making complete stops at stop signs (what can I say....I am impatient), not having the correct paperwork etc before just by being nice (I think). And I've had some speeding tickets to pay in the past, smiling doesn't solve everything but it can help. I DID have an issue with a cop that pulled me over several times in Kenai a few years ago, also late at night and he would be rude to me and I got a hostile vibe from him. There was something off about him I felt. I solved that by going into the station where I had a talk to the person in charge. I explained how I felt and that took care of that issue, he never pulled me over after that.
What is going on in the world? It's sad. It's scary. I feel bad for all of us. I need to do MY part. I'm still searching for the meaning of this life.

Me and Ninna. Teenagers. We used to have so much fun.


I know I have been absent here......I hope you (my wonderful readers) are all well and having a beautiful Summer!
So I got this book..... Do Unto Animals by Tracey Stewart. You do not have to be a vegan to be mindful of animals and their rights. I am myself not a vegan but I don't eat meat. I don't miss eating meat (except Polish sausage) and I feel healthy physically. You should always respect animals and treat them kindly, they give us so much and we have treated them badly throughout history and still do. I think it is a parental duty for example to teach children to be kind, respectful and grateful to animals, ALL living creatures even insects. Even if you eat meat you can and should be mindful and thankful of how much we get from them.

For now......I don't have much to say or divulge. Maybe later on. Or not.
I do have a new reader that left me a very nice comment on an older entry called "Donation" that I wrote September 13 of last year. It made me happy and as usual when I get emotional I cried a bit.

"You're beautiful.... and as corny as this sounds, "not just on the outside." I "love" you for the way you treat your dog. My wife and I have a Pitbull and love him just like you, and treat him like family. You're a really good person, and I don't even know you. I think you have a kind heart and both of us enjoy reading your blog. Best of luck to you and your "baby."

Thank You for the kind words Derek and it makes me happy that you and your wife enjoy my blog.....despite of me not writing a whole lot this year.

Me and Chhaya are going to go and look at some sheep now, she finds them extremely interesting. The sheep don't care much for Chhaya, they are too busy eating grass.

Dinner Book Movie & Waffle

Last Friday evening I was invited to dinner at a friend of a friend's house. It was lovely.....rather perfect actually. The food was excellent. The salad was made from vegetables the host, Liz grows in her own garden and it might had been the best salad I have ever had, including the home made salad dressing. After dinner I sat outside in the garden sipping on a cup of hot Earl Grey that tasted wonderful while enjoying conversation and getting warmed up by this fireplace.

It was one of the nicest home I have been to. And the company was great. I love being around civilized people discussing a wide range of topics.
I have also fished this book by Fredrik Backman (a Swedish author) Britt-Marie Was Here the second novel I've read by him.
Now I need a new book to read!

And the other day me, Drinda and Deborah (my new friends) went and saw Tarzan. A love story with a shirtless Alexander Skarsgård in it....another Swede. I love love stories!

And i just finished my latest obsession, this yummy waffle and latte. I think I will need to come back tomorrow for more!

Sunday Thoughts

Sunday.....a day for thoughts. For you too?
So much BAD going on in the world. Again, I am not grasping why there is so much evil and suffering. Is this life here and now really hell? I am starting to think so.
All the latest suicide bombings killing so many, people getting tortured, parents in the US shooting and slicing the necks of their own children, people being cruel to animals. What is going on? I wish all of those disgusting sub humans would had been aborted instead of born. Seriously. Ponder that all of you pro life people.
Fun for little children to be born into a life of abuse, neglect and then be finished off by beatings or getting their neck sliced. So much for parenting.
Tonight Iceland (I say Island) and France (Frankrike) EUFA EURO 2016. Of course I want Island to win!
I attended a wonderful dinner party the other evening, finished a book and this afternoon I am going to the movies. More on all of that later. I will also take Chhaya, her toys and a blanket and go to a park with green soft grass. She has an irritation in between some of her toes that has flared up, I am trying to clean it and medicate but it is rather red. Poor baby.
Today I tried a Pakistan Rose Latte with toasted cinnamon - thumbs up!

I hope YOU are having a nice Sunday!